I try to capture moments
but they flit away
butterflies and dying moths
erratic
and just out of my reach
For example
I remember vividly
the feel of the statue
but not the look on your face when I touched it
and made it jingle-jangle in the breeze
a bit of magic
in a city
that I almost want to forget
I would rather have the memories of you
than the vivid thoughts of cobbled streets
and pouring rain.
Author notes
Written February 8th, 2004
What did you think
Comments
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Thank you so much, Esther. Your comments give me hope, and make me want to write more.
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This is beautifully written...quivering with nostalgia and delicate as memory. I like brief poems only when they say more than they seem to on the surface, and this one speaks volumes: lost loves, forgotten faces, times left behind. Despite this being something the majority of people will identify with, you've effortlessly avoided cliche to create something original, plaintive and lovely. I particularly liked the line 'I remember vividly the feel of the statue but not the look on your face...' - how beautifully poignant that is! And it's funny, isn't it, how the material things can sometimes cling more stubbornly to memory than the physical? Lovely write.
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good
I like the poem. I don't completely understand it, but I get a glimpse of it in my mind. I don't like the "for example" part, but other than that it was good.
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