Take a look into the distant inside
As white symmetric clouds dance in the sky
The loons call a forlorn silence with their calls
It's nice too see you silouetted by the topaz skies
It's a quite happy lazy afternoon
As each blade of green grass is peripatetic in celebration
I watch the blue ringed planets circle forever in the sky
The reason for this I don't know why
The cobalt lake glimmers in phosphorescent radiance
While the ripples dance and play in quiet reflection
Soon the air is filled with colored leaves
The blow away to a far off place that I just don't know
Now the sun sets in an explosion of red
As a pillar of light jettisons from the horizon forevermore
I am happy that I see you here
Maybe this night will be one that will forbear
So it will be that I will drift
Into reverse rest among the trees
As the sky slowy fades into dark amethyst
This place will slowly fade away among encaustic stars
A contest entry
- prewrites by Melissa Gayle.
800 points, ended December 10, 2008, 26 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Against All Odds, We Touched the Stars with Our Toes by PaintedParisPassion.
550 points, ended December 24, 2008, 25 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Lost in Space by Butterfly24.
400 points, ended December 30, 2008, 9 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
-
I love the form and the choice of words in this piece. Thanks for entering and good luck. Keep writing and thanks for sharing.
Peace and loooove
-B -
You control and understanding of the language is quite admirable.
I do think that there are places that can be pared down, it does become a bit too much of a mouthful.
Still well written.
Adding your comment:
