Purple hours of dream embrace and intoxicate my spirit,
Lending comfort from harsh daylit aching and Your absence, oh my heart.
My eyes drink You in at once exultant and agonized by longing to touch You.
I am reduced to a moth drunk on the fiery glow of Your beauty, encircling You.
My heart's fevered desire enrobes You in ageless resplendence, King of my soul.
The pure Hell of loving You while You turn away unaware of me
Is sweeter by far than any false Heaven in the arms of another.
Do You not see, can You not feel this love so exquisite that wrings my senses,
Your touch is a reprieve I am laid waste waiting for.
My every heartbeat is the praying of your name, again, again,
If only You would release me from the prison I endure waiting,
Waiting for You to look up and see the love I carry for You alone.
I know no fear of death, only that I will meet my fate loving You.
Author notes
(pant, pant, pant)
A contest entry
- Unrequited love by Smokebox.
550 points, ended December 8, 2008, 17 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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I am positively, and irrevocably, stunned into silence. My heart swelled and broke, what passion... A crescendo of inexplicable beauty that one must endure the unforgiving heat of, a desire and love of an almost extinct kind. You kicked the seat from under me, then the hardwood floor, then the very earth... There is nothing to end my descent..
I will fall, over and over again, into this masterpiece, and wrap myself in its flames. What a delicious way to burn. You have completely blown me away. Whoever the inspiration was to this, look to him once more. Exquisite. Dare I say it, utter perfection.
A symphony worth the finest diamonds, and more.
Enraptured, and enchanted,
~A love-struck Ms. Sang.
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Wow, thanks, Ms. Sang, I'm pleased you like this...
It's funny, a lot of people respond very strongly to this particular poem and yet for me, candidly I don't feel as stoked about this one as I do about others I've writ... Hmm. I guess I am not always the best judge of how things will resonate or go over with readers... I wonder how common that is. -
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I did much more than like this, my humble friend, *chuckles*. It is very common. I never know how my readers will react to my stuff, I just 'go with the flow', as they say, lol. Accept the praise and constructive criticism; tell the other bastards to dip their extremities in nucleic acid.
. I hope you'll find the same beauty in all of your poems as many people have in this one.
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This is beautiful! I love the subject, the use of beautiful extended and eloquent vocabulary, and the powerful imagery in that. Awesome! Magnificent! *Gives you big box of cookies* XD xx
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Thanks, I love cookies. Thanks for the feedback, too.
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Aw, this is so damn awesome! You take a great snapshot of what it means to be in love. I like how you capitalized You, and it definitely reflects how much you like that person. It's the sublest things that matter the most!
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Wow, so much emotion! I definitely see why you are panting!! great write, good luck and thanks for entering!
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