I feel so hurt
My heart is torn right open
You know just what to do
To make me despise you
To make me despise me
For simply being me
You say what you will say
Then turn the other way
I feel so lost
I'm not sure where I belong
I belong with those I love
Or somewhere up above
But not right here
For here is where I fear
The loneliness and solitude
And no one I love near
I feel so gone...
Author notes
A little something something I wrote during a depressed period...
A contest entry
- Just make it amazing. by ThisIsMyWonderland.
400 points, ended June 23, 33 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The Passions of the Heart (Hate, Envy, and Jealousy contest) by MYsecondchance.
1100 points, ended June 27, 28 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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I think this piece would be so powerful if you learnt to SHOW me pain instead of just TELLING me about it. Why is your heart torn? What did "you" do to make you despise them?
I think this poem is only the skin of the story. Just what is obvious. You need to get deep into the problem area. What happened, how do you feel, things like that. Its not a bad poem, but I know it has the potential to be so much more
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