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Where The Heart Is

Where the heart is,

you'll never know

who has the biggest

or who's is as cold as snow.

 

Who loves me??

I am not sure

is it him or him?

I'm lovesick and need a cure!

 

Please help,

i am a sick little lovebird

I have a boyfriend

but... i dont know... THIS IS ABSURD!!

 

This is not a sickness that i can cure

all by myself

Not with medicine, not with a doctor

but all I need is his help

 

Do I still love him?

Does he still love me ?

These questions need to be answered

I hope that you agree

 

DO I like another guy?

or do i need him?

please help me

i do not know what is out and what is in.

Author notes

I am confused

What did you think

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments


  • gypsywitch0187
    March 12

    Edit | Reply

    hm your "I"s

    aren't capitalized, otherwise a great poem.
    I have a habit of capitalizing mine now, just practice.

    ♥tawns♥

  • Waterlily857
    December 6, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Nice Stini!!!!! You forgot brownie and prailine I'm sure Jake-y willl love it..... Lol see ya later

  • home
    December 4, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Your poem shows a lot of confusion, which is what it is meant to [judging from your author note].

     

    I felt this poem had a lot of forced rhyme.

     

    EX:

    "Do I still love him?

    Does he still love me back?

    These questions need to be answered

    OMG i need a tic-tac!"

     

    I also feel that a cleaning up of punctuation would do this poem good.

     

    Other than that, your display of what you are feeling is brought to attention through this piece.

  • cindy4
    December 4, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Good write