It’s a bitter situation, a lengthy, drawn out orchestration.
Filled with marionettes and figurines,
tied to strings which smell of perfume, love and kerosene;
One to do the trickery, one to cast illusions.
The other to take life after generous contributions.
And they’ll say that I’ve lost my way, my mind, my charm.
But they’re just dancing in your courtyard,
they’re just twisted-tangled in your yarn.
The strings will keep me spinning, twirling at
your fingertips, and I’ll stay trapped tightly, naively
‘tween your lips.
And you’ll continue to configure and contrive
just enough assurance to keep your toys alive.
You’ll dance atop your hills and pyres, manipulating all of us on wires.
Like marionettes and figurines, you’ll hold us in your hands,
And you’ll live out our aspirations, you’ll fulfill our future plans.
But just before you’ve had your fill, just before your victory
And just before you’re through…
A marionette, a figurine will come with eyes of crimson fires
and spread apart your lies, your lips and snap your dreadful-wires.
They’ll tear your walls, they’ll storm your halls
They’ll burn your holy things.
They’ll break your will, they’ll mount your hills,
They’ll snap your precious strings.
And just before the conclusion of your bitter situation,
Just before the end of your drawn out orchestration,
Just before you’ve thrown your final peasant to the fire,
And Just before you’re through,
Someone just like me will tie a string to you.
It won’t be ‘round your back, your arms, or ‘round your hips
but rather just above your chest,
and slightly ‘neath your lips.
Author notes
Title; option four
A contest entry
- Darkest poems by HatedLoveDieingRose.
400 points, ended December 5, 2008, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Stun me. by heavenbird.
590 points, ended December 5, 2008, 27 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Dark and/or Love poetry contest, posted from Korea! (ROK) by Akarian.
950 points, ended January 20, 34 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Tap Shoes and Tutus (prewrites welcome) by Danna Hobart.
400 points, ended January 17, 11 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Titles # 3 by cirque du soleil.
525 points, ended February 5, 17 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - prewrite contest first come first sure by serenity silvermoon.
566 points, ended February 27, 34 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - sad, depressed, suicide, cutting, rape anything like that i want by serenity silvermoon.
525 points, ended March 1, 32 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - I've Exposed Your Lies... Dark Contest.. by Nymphetemine.
400 points, ended March 10, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Mulitple Choice (Options Galore) by HereComesTheSun.
525 points, ended April 4, 22 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Calling all gold and silver prize poems.. (Round 1) by xXGoddessofPainXx.
400 points, ended April 23, 43 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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I like it it's different, interesting so unique.. I really enjoyed reading the piece.. Congrats see you in round 2
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Positive: great word choice i mean overall this was stunning and you did an awesome job with the rhyme and the flow of this piece you painted a gorgeous picture and really had artwork written here.
Negative: in the stanza
"A marionette, a figurine will come with eyes of crimson fires
and spread apart your lies, your lips and snap your dreadful-wires.
They’ll tear your walls, they’ll storm your halls
They’ll burn your holy things.
They’ll break your will, they’ll mount your hills,
They’ll snap your precious strings."
i feel it got a bit elementry with the rhyme i mean fire wire...
but thank you very much for the entry -
Brilliant write dear poet.. Thank you ....
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I absolutly love this peom....and that's all I can say.


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They’ll tear your walls, they’ll storm your halls
They’ll burn your holy things.
They’ll break your will, they’ll mount your hills,
They’ll snap your precious strings.
hmm...even though this is a prewrite, it fits pretty well...good job!
i love this piece...exactly what I was looking for....dolls can be made to appear quite sinister if you put your mind to it....:-)
Love your vocabulary...especially 'marionette'!
Thank you for entering!! -
This was masterful. So evil, and so good.
Thanks so much for entering.

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Interesting, a lot of good metaphor and imagry. I wasn't sure about the leangth when I first look, but you captivated me right away and sped me along down this very smoothly flowing poem. Good job and good luck!
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wow
your poem was wonderful. very good.
They'll tear your walls, they'll storm your halls
They'll burn your holy things.. i like that part.. i dont know why but i do!!! good job -
I really love this.
Such a complex and well thought out idea.
I love the emotion and imagery.
Best of luck! -
very nice write! i think we can all relate to feeling like a marrionette at some time in our lives. if you are interested, check out my poem along the same lines, called "Revolution".


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