Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

Drama

Lights up.
My heart is a flutter
As I step out
Onto the vast stage
That has become my home
In the past six weeks.
The spotlight shines
Burning my skin
Making me feel
As if every single person watching
Is there to watch me fail.
This is my moment to shine
I have worked relentlessly
Memorizing words that were not my own
Making them my own
For this one night
I am my character
And she is me.
Deep breath
Inhale
Exhale
I begin to recite my lines
And somewhere along the line
They transform into my own

I unconsciously become lost

I am my character

My life

My problems

They no longer matter

The only thing that matters

Is this moment

My moment

My time to shine

Applause surrounds me

Consuming me like a starving wolverine

As i smile

And bow

Absorbing my success

Like a plant in the sun.

A contest entry

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments


  • Perfect Asymmetry
    December 16, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This piece is brilliant! It's so powerful, feelings so well expressed. We all fear the failure and long for success and admiration.
    Way to go!
    Nela


  • Peripatetic gold member
    December 7, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    The trepidation and painful images of the spotlight contrast with the last line in which sees the attention like the light from which a plant takes its energy. The player also revises the concept of the audience from that of a hostile entity to one of benevolence, even sustenance. The body of the poem is the transition between these opposites, making sense of the contrast. The use of present tense lends us a sense of the transition occurring real time.

    The line, “Consuming me like a starving wolverine,” is strong, but seems out of place. All of the other climactic images are positive, but this one makes the applause a voracious predator/scavenger rather than an image of warm, supportive energy as is referenced in the last line. Also, I wonder if “As a smile” was intended to be “As I smile.”


  • Cant force beloved
    December 5, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Nice capture of your feelings, I think you've done well writing this poem.