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Meet Me In Paris

Missing image


I want you
in the first moment
of a Parisian sunrise,
with paisley shadows
teasing my tits
and your still-sleepy mouth
warm-kissing them


I want to stir
pale lavender light
through the morning sky
with songs from my body
as it embraces each

deep-pillow thrust


to never once look away
from your eyes,
(please never forget me)
or to let go of your hands
when dawn explodes
into another small miracle.

 

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Author notes

Prompt:  I'm calling on my favorite AP friends to help. Please! Whether you're on my list or I'm on yours, please pen me something original. Pen me what you pen best. If it's dark, then write dark. If it's erotica, then pen me erotica...

 

 

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Comments

1 - 48 of 48

  • wbiro gold member
    July 9

    Edit | Reply
    so this is what you 'pen best'... and 'please never forget me'... what the hell is that?!!! Ah, I see a troubled life here... but A+ for poetry...


  • medicalpoet
    January 31

    Edit | Reply

    Paris is always sexy

    Honorable? WTF... i hope the other three are the mozart of the poetic brotherhood. lol... anywho, good erotic poem.

  • eyelids shut
    January 5
    Edit | Reply
    That was beautiful.


  • Sesheta
    December 29, 2008
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    Pure poetry.


  • AutumnGypsy gold member
    December 13, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    So perfect this moment is that I got lost in it and went to read it again. You are the best writer this side of anyway lady l. Congratulations on your HM to me it is gold.


  • geckogirl silver member
    December 9, 2008
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    to never once look away from your eyes this is truely beautiful..


  • katelynmcdougall
    December 9, 2008
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    great!

    I love it, its very well written and a stunning image rushes through my mind, great job!


  • Jeremy0826 silver member
    December 8, 2008

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    Simply beautiful and a wonderful thought that you've penned here! Very sensual and soft words.
    Congrats to you on your trophy here!




    Jeremy0826


  • jazzcat gold member
    December 6, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    There's a sweet beauty to this that stirs the fires of the soul. I'm not a prude by any means, but I think if you took out the more overt sexual references this piece would be even more powerful. As it is, it is a strong, sensual piece with great imagery and depth.

  • Melrose
    December 6, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Such an elegant, beautiful piece. Your words and imagery are intoxicating.


  • Catie Sheeran gold member
    December 5, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    oh, wow...this is so sensual and stunningly beautiful. somehow you captivated me with your words and i got lost in them. this very rarely happens....im in awe

    wow....

    just wow...lol


  • Paloszoo gold member
    December 5, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    WOW. This is simply amazing.......stunning. A beautiful sensual write. I wish I had something like this in my life. Been all over Europe, but never been to Paris. Must go now! Thank you so much for standing by my side. I appreciate you!


  • Balldinger silver member
    December 4, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Paris is for Parisians...

    oui, oui, oui...all the way home. who can remember anything at this age... oh, you weren't talking to me. sorry - i'm so vein, i thought this song was about me...


  • light to a dreamer gold member
    December 4, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Very nice word use. I can see the picture better now in my head now. And the thought of loss with dawn. I can say I like this very much


  • usefuldistraction
    December 4, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    "tits" has become elegant, finally! It took you and Paris to do it and without apology, I love this strong passionate piece of poetry!


  • DropDeadLEADER
    December 4, 2008
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    Divine

    I love the lines that contain the part about the eyes. I love that!


  • Blueskywonder
    December 4, 2008

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    Absolutely beautiful! Imagery and romantic content make this piece stunning.

  • Yvette Champ gold member
    December 4, 2008

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    So sensual and dancing with yearning, lovely usage of imagery and emotion with pace re the still sleepy mouth warm kissing the breasts, as natural as a reflex action, the mouth searching for succour.


    Kudos.


  • Polaja Greeters member
    December 4, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is a beautiful poem I don't think that there is anything that I can pick out that people haven't already - but my favorite part was the stirring of the lavender light stunning imagery!



    Polly


  • csmmoms2
    December 4, 2008

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    Really lovely

    I'd planned to drag her to Paris and surprise her with a gift of a diamond ring. We never got there, but somehow "we'll always have Paris". -c


  • DolceVito gold member
    December 3, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    "...with paisley shadows
    teasing my tits
    and your still-sleepy mouth
    warm-kissing them"...Brilliant


  • tomisb
    December 3, 2008

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    I see the poetry you have created in men so that they no longer can crawl into a dark cave and pretend there is no star in their night. I wander on the face of the moon letting my fingers be filled with the light as it spills across the roof of your house.
    Love, Tom B.


  • Alyzeh
    December 3, 2008

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    You never cease to amaze me with your poetry. Amazing write, so very sensual. Extremely well written. Good luck in the contest Lane.

    Love
    Alyzeh

  • silverfish
    December 3, 2008
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    that's a good idea: a surrender at dawn. and very french. -s


  • george the 23rd
    December 3, 2008

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    Two sides...

    Lovely write here! And you got away with using "tits" without sounding base or vulgar! This- (the sentiment, not the style)
    reminded me of Bukowski's poetry. How he would throw out something approaching vulgar, but follow it up with something tender, beautiful and warm. Also, "(please never forget me)" really brings an intimate, frail, very human air to this write. Beautifully done.


  • Disturbed Prodigy
    December 3, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    all i can say is that this was something golden my friend, i mean that you did something beautiful with that pen, keep it flowing and good luck in the contest


  • Jersene gold member
    December 3, 2008

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    Lane, your erotica is always so tastefully written...just reading through the comments, it's so easy to see why you have such a big following. The image of 'paisley shadows' is brilliant.


  • daviscth silver member
    December 3, 2008
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    What stunning imagery in your words Lane!!! Best wishes in the contest.


  • malmadre gold member
    December 3, 2008

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    I love paisley patterns, reminding me of seed pods or sperm with their tapered tails, full of life and blooming things. Paisley shadows..teasing, a fascinating image and then a tender scene with the eyes never looking away, reading one another to the very depths of soul.
    This poem is so blessed with romance and intense passion, sharing a dawn together. Simply lovely!


  • Amera gold member
    December 3, 2008

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    This is written with so much emotion and class. Damn, I'm impressed! The originality of your metaphor always amazes me. Please never "let go of my hands"

    Love,
    Amera♥

  • strangerforeigner
    December 3, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    awesome use of imagery using the various senses. Tight, well done.


  • cricketjeff gold member
    December 3, 2008

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    At your utterly brilliant best, the final three lines are an explosive metaphor, wonderful.

    And best of all a happiness seems to shine through the writing, it feels that you are in a very good place and that feels very good to me.


  • chilali
    December 3, 2008

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    This is so beautiful. I love it. You are the queen of poetry! Hehe. Well done and good luck in the contest

    Much love
    Ylova


  • JohnnyD gold member
    December 3, 2008

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    Superbly done-as always
    Stoking a distant memory of mine

    Since a child I have oft wondered
    Why some places-some people
    Some cities- some experiences
    Have their own unique sets of colors?
    Paris –a vibrating palette of pastels
    Singapore- brilliant oranges and yellows
    San Francisco-languid misty blues
    People I know-tend towards artist’s breath
    Breath- in the intermingling of expressions
    My most trusted-and adored local friend
    Is Gauguin- over brushed by whispers of Monet
    My best friend at work Seurat-blended with Renoir
    Myself- Warhol, seduced by Monet
    Experiences-experiences indeed?
    Some are red-bleeding yellow
    Others foggy Grey chilling sunrise
    And perhaps the best of all-
    Rainbows of dreams-
    ~languishing forever~



    Len


  • arafura gold member
    December 3, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    "...with paisley shadows
    teasing my tits
    and your still-sleepy mouth
    warm-kissing them"

    You never fail to please the reader my friend. This is wonderfully 'Sunday morning in bed with your baby' to me. Languid lovemaking that is sweet and unforgetable. Excellent!


  • Mairi bheag gold member
    December 3, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    ... also I meant to say how much I was captivated by the poignancy and plaintiveness of the parenthesised words.

  • Mairi bheag gold member
    December 3, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    "or to let go of your hands
    when dawn explodes
    into another small miracle."

    I have grown to expect this kind of metaphor from you - the dawn suddenly bringing in another day of wonderful life, the climax of lovemaking coinciding with it, the two combining - good grief, k-c, it's almost banal now LOL!

    I remember the first time a friend chided me for putting the word "tits" into a poem. The word just fitted. It seemed vulgar yet tender. Same goes here. (I love it when you talk dirty, but very few people can pull that off in a poem!)

    Overall... whew... good poem.


    • Dalaney gold member
      December 3, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      Mairi....

      banal? well, now you KNOW i will have to
      change that

      • Mairi bheag gold member
        December 3, 2008

        Edit | Reply
        NO NO NO, I didn't say it WAS banal, just that I have grown to expect such lovely metaphor from you that the occurrence itself almost SEEMS banal! You NEVER give me banal poetry.


  • notorious gold member
    December 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    "paisley shadows"
    What's paisley again; some kind of pattern? I knew a girl named Paisley Geronimo...bloody cool name, but bloody boring ass girl.
    Anyways, I like this phrase; it's very vivid in my head, especially since I can't remember precisely what paisleys look like.

    'still-sleepy' 'warm-kissing' 'deep-pillow'
    You are SO good with hyphens.
    DAMN.


    "when dawn explodes
    into another small miracle."
    Well fuck and a half,
    that's amazingly poetic
    and 'explodes'...LMAOOOOOOOOOOO
    but it's actually quite a poetic word; makes me think of a conundrum.
    Or an orgasm.


    ;
    Jessica


  • Swangrnv gold member
    December 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    I want you ..

    without a net to cling safely to..
    like the fly in a web, i'm thru..
    no one can recreate the magic of you..
    thank god you you bless us like you do..
    you are the best!


  • IronMaiden1236
    December 2, 2008
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    God Bless!!! I need a spritz....


  • Pure Thought silver member
    December 2, 2008
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    My Lady

    You have a book of poetry, that is published in my heart. Poems like this are the dessert.


  • Cerulean Sunrise gold member
    December 2, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    I've never been to Paris.
    You have crafted something of sensual beauty here.


  • Cannonsfire
    December 2, 2008

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    Just sighs and closes her eyes to dream of Paris again C

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