Please...don't try to fix me
I realize I'm broken
Hiding my pain with smiles
the truth goes unspoken
They say time heals all
maybe that's true
So if time's on my side
what else could you do
A life filled with loneliness
now shows on my face
Whispers of darkness
a heart left to waste
I hold my own strength
I've survived through it all
So...don't try to fix me
if I need you I'll call
Author notes
Option 2- quotes: "Here I am,as perfect as I;m ever gonna be."
darlintlc
A contest entry
- Calling all Favs of Paloszoo (contest) by Paloszoo.
700 points, ended December 7, 2008, 24 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - ~Anything And Everything~ by Lae Fyrestorme.
1030 points, ended April 1, 54 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 26 of 26
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Great poem, filled with emotion and the hard honest truth.
This is my favorite stanza:
"They say time heals all
maybe that's true
So if time's on my side
what else could you do"
Congrats on the HM
Amber
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Thanks much!
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I actually liked how you used the cliche
"Please...don't try to fix me
I realize I'm broken"
and got away with it!! Adding it to the rest of the poem almost made it your own.
I might have given you more than HM.
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Thanks much! I didn't realize that was a cliche... maybe that's why I got away with it. LOL!!
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I can relate so well with this. I lov the emotion and how bluntly you put how you know you're broken.
"Don't try to fix me" Truly a great write.
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Thanks much... I think we are all broken in one way or the other. lol
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This is amazing. It goes so well with the quote. Thanks for entering
~Lae -
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Thanks much! When I read that quote I knew this poem was meant to go with it...glad you liked it!
good-luck with your contest
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Cool
I really enjoyed reading this poem the ryhme is really good. And i too agree with you "don't try to fix me" is very powerful and you made a powerful poem. Well done and congratulations with the hm.
Lana
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Thanks much for reading and the wonderful comment!
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Very Good
My goodness but you have some very good lines here, my favorite being "I realize I'm broken."
My only suggestion would be to correct a misspelling in line 9... I think it should be loneliness. Other then that, very good poem indeed.
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Thanks much for the read and comment! Thanks very much for letting me know about my oops! I fixed it but I guess I needed some help after all...LOL
Tracey
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says it all
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Thanks much!
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Good!
I like the last two lines, reminds me of me.
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Thanks much for the read and glad u enjoyed it!
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Love the title! This is how I feel most of the time, except this time I put out a call to all of you
This is a great piece. Really enjoyed it, and I appreciate how you've come to me in my time of need. Thank you!
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Glad you liked the title and didn't get upset with me for using your words! It's so much better for us when we can ask for help from others but for me it's so hard...I really love helping others but when it comes to asking for help I see it as a weakness in myself! I believe it was the way my Mom taught me.
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AMAZING. I ABSOLUTELY loved this. This is how I would feel, if my friends and family actually seemed concerned. Heh. Great, great poem. I loved it.
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Thanks much for the great comment! I guess I've got too much pride to want help exspecially from my family!
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this is brilliant, A great rhythm and rhyme, and a very touching and heartfelt plea, i love this.Possibly one of my favourites of yours, and my best read today
thanks, and thanks too for reading my stuff recently, much appreciated
theresa
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Thanks much for your kind comment! This one is one of my favourites too...I felt really strongly about what it said.
Glad u enjoyed it and thanks for reading!
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WOW
A very moving piece, written with a nice sense of rhythm and flow..and though the words seem full of hurt and pain..there's a resolve there also. i like this piece!
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Thanks much for the read and comment! I'm a stubborn kind of person...that's what gives me the strength I need to fix myself!
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Beautifully Poignant...
Wishing you the best of luck in the contest! Peace, Cyn 
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Thanks much for your nice comment!
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