I thought....
I thought you stopped.
I thought it was over.
Your vice.
Our drain.
The smoking is back again.
I could never stand the smell of it on you.
I still can't.
Then how did I not notice?
I will not stand to watch you
die all over again.
I have seen what it did to you
and I don't want to watch it again.
All the times your deep hazel eyes
clouded.
"I need a smoke" they said.
Not "Happy 8th Birthday, I love you."
All the arguments.
All the screaming.
You were being beaten about the head and shoulders
by your own guilt.
Why bother to bring it back?
In my mind's eye
I see the smoke curling from your lips
and I cry for you.
My heart is breaking.
I can't stand to see you do this.
I try to find a source of blame,
just to know that you had no choice
and I come up every time
worse than empty.
The blame lies with me.
A daughter ignoring her family.
A daughter shunning her own father
over petty disagreements.
And pain that I thought was gone
resurfaces in the form
of those stupid little white sticks.
Old habits do die hard.
Or not at all.
Author notes
It's about my dad picking up a bad habit...again... *sigh* As you can tell it pisses me off a little...
Contest Entry!
I find my inspiration with whatever is bothering me most at the time. Or on my mind most prominently, I think... Once I write it, the dominance of the thought disappears. And I can think clearly again. That would be the reason most of my poems make no sense, but to me they make perfect sense. I get it and it's all that matters. However, I did put specific efforts into this one because it is for a dear friend's contest and I don't want to submit crap... :-P
*sigh*
A contest entry
- Take Me Somewhere We Can Be Alone... by ShatterglassSecret.
1700 points, ended December 13, 2008, 23 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
*sigh*
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
-
i like it. i like how you say, 'die all over again" that is really powerful
-
the last two lines slup up your poem of habit...Old habits die hard...or not at all. My dad smoked too but they have to decide when they need to stop. Our wishes alone will not stop their habit.
-
good job. i hate it too.
-
I do believe this is the first anti smoking poem I have ever read. It was very well done, though I am a smoker myself. My best wishes.
-
smoking's a terrible vice. i'm rooting for you to get him to stop before he does real damage to himself.
you are inspired by your emotions, particularly the strong emotion of anger, it would seem. this piece is explicitly clear about what is bothering you, why it's bothering you, and what you're feeling about it. your ability to express yourself is incredible. good luck to you. i hope that even if you can't fix all the things that make you feel like this, you at least feel better after writing about it. thank you for your tempestuous entry. -
-
that's an amazing word. tempestuous.... ill have to remember it.
-
Adding your comment:
1 - 6 of 6
