This burning feeling in my chest
No longer shall I compress.
The beast comes out of its cave
Blood being the thing it craves.
Hope you can contain the rage?
No, this is more then can be contained.
Stand back for it's set free
Its your fault for this misery.
I hope you hurt
I hope you cry
You fucking bitch I hope you die
Words aren't enough to explain
The loss of blood within my veins
You caused the blood but not the pain
This sick thing you call a game
Is the meaning of inhumane
You had your fun now let me try
For so long you watched me cry
You saw the blood and watched it dry
Now you will see the other side
I'll take your love I'll take it all
You won't feel a thing throughout it all
You won't hurt but you can laugh
For emotions will be taken last
Now you will see how it feels
When all you want is to feel
You cry for mercy upon deaf ears
Cries for more is all I hear
Let me make one thing clear
The more you hurt and the more you fear
The more I enjoy your bloody tears
I watch you suffer with open eyes
Enjoying it more as time goes by
Loving it to much to see you die
What more could I love but to watch you cry?
A contest entry
- Love and Other Four-Letter Words by charmander13.
700 points, ended December 10, 2008, 24 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - the DARKWRITE challenge rides again by Ktulu Blackwolfe.
600 points, ended December 20, 2008, 39 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Hate
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Tighten this one up! there are a couple of grammatical errors on this one, so read it with an editorial eye and you will find the ones that I saw. Otherwise, great piece!

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There are some great emotions here, though I highly recommend checking your spelling and grammar; the message here is a powerful one and deserves to be heard by all, unobstructed
Well done & good luck!
Laura, aka Immortal
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Powerful emotions here, such a forceful piece. Really does say it all! Very well penned. Thanks for entering and good luck
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Oh. My. God. I just absolutely loved this! This is such a raw, nervewrecking, gutbursting poem- well done!
The rhythm is pulsating and the tone is harsh... but hey, this *is* about hate, yeah, and I like it this way.
Thanks so much for entering my contest and all the best to you! -
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lol just glad you liked it. thanks for the comment
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1 - 5 of 5





