Little heart, explode, explode
in medieval times you’d have been wed
with child by the time you were fifteen
or spinster at age twenty-three
an old maid at age thirty-one
if you were lucky to live that long;
no wonder medieval times were dark
young hearts exploding without a thought
no one around with experience since
the last Black Death had hit them hard…
Little heart, today you wait
you yearn, you die a love each day;
but for the betterment of humanity
for the order of society
with the free world hanging on a thread
oh love, you must wait instead,
grow older, wiser, no kiss, no eyes
to reel him in, love you to death;
sorry heart, that is not the way
little hearts must live today…
A contest entry
- Accepting Responsibility by celticwarrior.
700 points, ended December 2, 2008, 6 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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wow, I ran into this poem and thought it was really great - definitely should have won this contest. Don't find too many poems on here that I think twice about.
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thanks for the eyes- made me go back, and I found a few glitches...
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I love the rhythm of your work. I have only just recently started experimenting with rythmic freeverse myself. (As you very well know) I appreciate both the content and the presentation of this. Worthy of more than bronze in my book
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thanks- but remember, maybe more important than the rhythm is the music of the voice... if you can take it from the highest of highs to the lowest of lows in a heartbeat then you are a poet... and how do you become a poet? I think living life has a lot to do with it, and not just crafting pretty words, for how else are you going to put life into those highest of high's and lowest of low's? If a poet tries to fake it, the pretentiousness is always detected...
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A treasure of a poem. I especially liked the second half. Well done. Thank you.
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wise imagery...
like a macabre fable that harks lessons one could still relate to
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