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Restlessness

sitting in my room 
hands fall limp to my side
laying in bed
my eyes search the room for something
anything to take away this groaning
this growing, nagging pain
empty
that's how i feel
my heart
my mind
my soul
the very essence of who I am
of what I am
feels empty

blindly I search from day to day
being ever pushed down
I stoop lower and lower
searching into the depths of those around me
using only to be filled
but it's not enough
what ever will be?
when will this mindless searching be enough?
will it ever be?

Now I realize that I
yes me
I am yearning, craving, burning and aching
aching for him...


thoughts from a rose

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