Venom...
Under my skin,
From where you bit me.
Scars that have healed on the outside,
But are infected in the inside.
Poison,
Running through my arteries and veins,
Filling my cappilaries.
Killing me slowly from the inside.
I'm decomposing.
Fire,
I'm burning up from your touch.
The fire consumes me.
I am but ashes,
In a never ending inferno.
Death,
Tearing me apart,
Poisoning my heart,
Turning me to stone.
Now I am alone.
Carnage...
Violence all around me.
Feelings of pain,
Hurting the body and killing the soul.
Bleeding inside.
A contest entry
- the nameless wonder by Immortal Obscurity.
400 points, ended November 29, 2008, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Hi Ryan.
I didn't understand your poem: Venom, Poison, Fire, Death, Carnage.
I'm sorry. -
"Gone" is an awesome song. Reading the lyrics makes it come together.
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I liked your poem in general; however, your last stanza should be the one to pack the punch, and it didn't deliver. It was a flat end to an otherwise-good write. Well done though, and thanks for entering!
Laura
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wow ryan, this was an amazing poem! i loved the emotions in it and i could picture this in my head. all in all, an excellent write that took my breath away. keep up the good work!
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Fire,
I'm burning up from your touch.
The fire consumes me.
I am but ashes,
In a never ending inferno.
That one is the best buddy. Good write.
=)
Gwen
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