I thought it would be easy and painless
Like going to sleep after a long day
It wasn't easy or simple or painless
The Aspirin made me so nauseous
After I swallowed the first ten
I felt like I was going to vomit
Twenty Aspirin later I was scared
Starting to second guess whether
I was making the right decision or not
but I had ingested to many pill
To change my mind about overdosing
After sixty three pills I had to stop swallowing
If I put anything else in my mouth all the Aspirin
would have reversed their path and come back up
My ears started to ring
my head was pounding
the nausea was intensifying
my breathing was hard and fast
Then everything faded out
the way a movie fades out at the end
the way life fades out at the end
When I woke up there was tubes everywhere
the doctors said I wasn't out of the woods yet
even though I was breathing on my own now
"We're doing all we can"
They told me
"63 extra strength Aspirin don't mix well with 90 pound girls"
They had to add
My coma and brush with death
had left me feeling scared
I wanted to live now
but was it too late?
The heart monitor beeped a warning
that my pulse was too high
and my oxygen levels dropping
and my life still shaking
in my tenous grasp
Bruises from needle sticks and IVs bloomed
all over my arms and heads
I was sore and tired and scared
and lying on a hospital bed
in the pediatric intensive care unit
not knowing if I would survive.
A contest entry
- { depression/ suicide} by Angel Eyed Baby.
702 points, ended December 22, 2008, 67 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
-
Wow! An extremely powerful write, so full of details and facts about how you felt. I really hope this is not a true story... however if it is I hope that you are well on your way to feeling better.
Just a minor issue..."but I had ingested to many pill"
- should this be pills (plural?)
Also maybe a little more punctuation is needed to make this flow a little better.
Other than that this is an amazing write. I really like the following lines - It makes it really easy to relate to. "the way a movie fades out at the end
the way life fades out at the end" - love those likenesses.
-
I can relate so well. I have done the same thing 8 times but with 150 paracetamols ended up on life support too. Great write. Im so sorry you have been throught this too. If you ever need to talk im here
-
been there
ive been there back in 2006 i did the same thing other than i survived cuz here i am writing that but i had to spend 2 weeks in a sych ward...its not fun but ive realized there is more out there than i thought hope u did too
-
wow
I started crying after i finished reading that
omg
I did the exact same thing and omg wow that made me remember so much this is a amazing peice you wrote
Its unbeleivably fantastic
good job
and if you want to talk im here k
-
Oh my goodness honey
Did you know that in you being saved didnt happen by accident it wasnt just the drs working on you honey you were saved for God has plans for you plans to help others find their way in such hard times as you have lived .He needs your help to save others in this overwhelming need to survive . I so hope you never to this again I hope you put all your energy and love intyo helping those around you and in getting out and doing this you will find you will also be saving yourself from harm . You are loved more than you know so unlock the cage you have placed yourself in and go look into the mirror .I mean really look deep into your own eyes and tell me what you see . That young girl in there will be asking you why are you doing this to me when I love you so much .Why cant we go out and find life outside of your bedroom and have fun and laugh to be free of this silence about us . I am your very closest friend yet you never take the time to feel my need so I ask you what makes you happy what shall we do together to find this happiness and let our love be shown
Adding your comment:
1 - 5 of 5
