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Strange Oasis

 

Plagued with isolation-
hypothermia settles in,
maggots creep around-
destroying tender parts.


Within this suffering-
I cry out.

 

eyes

 become

o p e n e d


 This shelter that I'm in,

is my piece of heaven-
inside I grow,

becoming one,

with

myself.

 

 

Author notes

First Credit Picture - http://epitomei.deviantart.com/art/last-silence-i-find-for-you-892916
Second Credit Picture - http://inertiak.deviantart.com/art/Summer-Sleep-77314912
I used both prompts.

A contest entry

---------

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 17 of 17

  • amaranthine lover gold member
    January 2
    Edit | Reply
    beautiful piece my friend, I wish I wrote as simply striking as you do!


  • leander Moderators member
    January 2
    Edit | Reply
    I really like this poem sweety, but you're already on my favorite list
    lol


  • chilali
    December 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wow. This is awesome! I love it. I am in awe! The words and the imagery are just stunning! Good luck to you in the contest. This is definitely Gold!!

    Best wishes,
    Ylova


  • catz Moderators member
    December 8, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I like how you've gone from being lost and deadened to finding yourself, rebirthing the YOU that lies within these lines.

    Both pictures are very expressive of your thoughts in this superbly written piece, Kari

    I wish you best of luck in the contest

    love and
    Dee


  • Painted-Rose
    November 26, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Wow.


  • lovesky
    November 25, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Really nicely done!

  • mountain-woman
    November 25, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Excellent

    I really enjoyed this take you did with the pictures.
    I see death and rebirth of one's self in here and applaude the way you presented it. All the best in the contest, Michele


  • In Too Deep1
    November 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    A wonderful take on the prompt. I love how you have incorporated the yin and yang of realities distortion into a work of art through a kaleidoscope. A most enjoyable read. Best of wishes in the comp


  • Maatkara gold member
    November 24, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Very well done!


  • kiwigirljacks gold member
    November 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    How you managed to take this from to is great!! Sometimes solitude can give us that space to breathe and blossom!


  • maralisa silver member
    November 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    a great poem your imagery and emotions are outstanding I thought the impact of your first stanza was so deep and loved the last stanza it brings outsatnding hope to the reader good luck in the contest maralis


  • jcat gold member
    November 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I need a piece of heaven as beautiful as this!! You went deep and penned perfection!! Wonderful as always hun.....


  • Sweet Impatience gold member
    November 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I love this ... dark and foreboding in the beginning.. and then hopeful in the end.. I absolutely love the first stanza especially the line about the maggots such nice imagery...

    good luck
    mommy


  • KayJay
    November 24, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Wow... a touch of macabre with such a hopeful ending... Creative and darkly beautiful...
    Ken


  • Cerulean Sunrise gold member
    November 24, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    oneness rocks!


  • Cerulean Sunrise gold member
    November 24, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    It's creepy! I like that. hehehe



  • Cerulean Sunrise gold member
    November 24, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Good luck!

1 - 17 of 17