Stumbling Over Hazards

A typo in the prompt by Filla
Caused read to be read as red
"The Green" is the golf course newsletter
It carries stories of horror and dread.

What happened on that golf course is frightening
Monday night, about eleven, last week
A corpse in plus fours, dismembered
For clues, "The Green" did seek.

Reporter McMurphy, with pencil
And photographer Barry. B. Bean
Ventured out on the links at midnight
To make sure their shadows weren't seen.

The first was all quiet, as usual
Par four, dogleg to the right
McMurphy took a shot of her whiskey
She has more than a swig every night

They skipped a few holes out of boredom
Barry.B. was snapping like mad
With his trusty and faithful Box Brownie
It's the only job he's ever had.

But by the ninth it was getting quite scary
McMurphy was hot on the case
A rustle in the hedgerow, what was it?
Poor old Barry went white in the face

The Headless Golfer was real, alright
McMurphy knew that he wasn't a ghost
Barry B stumbled and fell over backwards
And was impaled on a G.U.R post.

It entered him via the ribcage
Tearing the spleen and his kidneys apart
The inferior vena cava was mangled
The gore was a macarbe work of art

McMurphy didn't seem all that bothered
Hell, she didn't even like Bean that much
But now she's got more pressing problems
A headless golfer that's begining to touch

Now McMurphy is really quite sexy
Red hair and plenty of breast
Her stockings and legs are to die for
The headless golfer would see to the rest

He couldn't see to undo her blouse buttons
Fiddled about like a teenager in lust
So McMurphy ripped of her top then her panties
And let Ol' Headless fondle her bust

But it was over as quick as it started
Maybe a minute, no longer than two
Ol' Headless just shrugged and adjusted
There wasn't much more he could do.

"Barry.B dead on the ninth playing night golf"
Said the headlines in "The Green" the next day
"On track to break the club record" it said
Now there's a tee where his body did lay.

McMurphy wont tell the true story
Of how Barry. B. Bean became to be dead
But will she venture out there again tonight?
Like "The Green" you can take it as red.