Such shivers you bring to me,
Such bad memories I see,
But when you look into these eyes,
Tell me, who do you Believe?
With hands of filth and blood,
And touch that is so cold,
Why belive the young over the old?
Author notes
Prompt::
"dead visions in your name
dead fingers in my veins"
- Slipknot [Dead Memories]
this poemis the first thing that came to mind for me...sorry if it does not meet your standers
A contest entry
- Prompt Inspired - Under 50 Words by Exodus.
700 points, ended November 26, 2008, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Some Originality by ScrewAllOfYou.
400 points, ended November 30, 2008, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
How cheesy is this poem?
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
-
I think this write is awesome
Good lucjk in the contest I think its a gold
-
-
you really think its a gold?
-
-
I'm not sure if the lack of capitalisation in the first half of the poem was deliberate or not, but if it was I don't think I quite understand its meaning. Also, there's a typo in the last line.
All that aside, I thought there was a power in the last three lines. You demand that people look at themselves and at what the poem is saying. Lovely to see such strength.
Thank you -
-
i fixed the spelling and the cap.
-
Thank you
-
-
Well done! I think you have made a fine attempt with this prompt. Keep writing
And no it's not cheesy!
Gaylene
-
-
Thank you, and i forgot to change the question when i wrote this poem lol
-
Adding your comment:
1 - 7 of 7
