As she sat there alone taking her English test
She wondered, silent,what would be the best.
The best way to alliterate her new poem,
So she could finish the test and finally go home.
Or how to sneak in personification,
She sighed in exhausted exasperation.
There's no way to do it' she thought to herself.
These English tests weren't good for her mental health.
Alliteration is repetition of sounds,
And ways to use it greatly abound.
The thought of thinking of that type of thing
Sounds so impossible, the defeat almost stings.
Her pencil moves, writing personification.
Conquering the page like a king does a nation.
Of it's own wild mind, her hand moves a long,
Scraping the paper in a tedious song.
The paper is full, a tyrant defeated
"Now can I go home?" The happy girl pleaded
"No!" said the teacher, "This poem is atrocious!"
Her tears were a lion, so very ferocious.
Author notes
We were taking an english test, and one of the questions wwas to write a poem or a paragraph using a metaphor, personification, and alliteration. My mind went blank, as it does whenever I ambenig forced to write something, so I wrote about writing the poem. The teacher liked it, but I wanted to know what the harsher critics of allpoetry had to say.
Comments
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ooppss
Now that I just reread it - maybe you shouldn't show your English teacher (tyrant defeated). -
Marvelous
Show this to your English teacher.... Standing ovation.
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mom, I wrote it on an english test.
He was the first to see it. Thank you for all your nice comments though. 
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hehe for some reason I can imagine this being written by someone who hasnt sleep in three days and has drank like a thousand litres of coffee and/or red bull. its very jumpy and energetic, which makes it a very fun poem to read!
thanks for sharing, I enjoyed reading and thanks for your comment on my poem, it was much appreciated
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haha ^_^ harsher critics.
this style of poem kind of makes me uncomfortable, the way its so jumpy and bouncy - if you know what i mean.
its still incredibly well written, but something about it makes me nervous. i dont know why.
brilliant idea, though.
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Yeah, it does seem to move wierdly fast. There was something I couldn't place that bugged me about it, but I was so relieved to have written something scceptable to hand in I didn't allow myself to pick it apart. Thanks for the comment!!
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I'd have to agree with your teacher (not the one in the poem, though!) that you did a really nice job on this!! I really like this penning, and I think it's great that you took a blank mind and wrote about it...bringing your paper to a close. I know the feeling, too: If I'm forced to write something, it will never come to be in the way I want it to. It's one of the main reason I never took Creative Writing Class in school.
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Nice write. I like the rhyming, especially more interesting words like "personification/exasperation," rhymes like that keep rhyming poetry interesting. I have to admit that I used (and overused) this technique on tests in highschool, writing way to many test essays about taking tests.
Fun read that brought back memories, and I think you did it better here than I ever did it.
One minor critique, I did not love the phrasing in the third line, where you repeat "be the best" from the line before. Not sure if it was done intentionally for effect, but it felt awkward
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A creative piece that I enjoyed, though it could be tweaked of some grammatical errors...
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Thank you for the comment! I proofread it quickly, but not thoroughly enough. It's fixed now I think.
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The first sentence sounds odd..."writing english test" to taking her english test or something?
in the last line of the second stanza, Enlish should be english
in the fourth stanza, longm should be long
This poem is very creative! I love how you incorporated all the parts of the test into this poem! I felt stressed about it right along with you! Great Work -
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yeah, that was kind of a typo. It was supposed to be writing her english test, but I changed it to taking. Thank you for pointing out those mistakes. I didn't proofread enough, because I'm allergic to looking at my poems right after I write them. Thanks again!
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Haha...it's very cute and clever. I like how you use alliteration in the stanza about alliteration, and personification in the stanza of personification.
"Now can I go home?" The happy girl pleaded
"No!" said the teacher, "This poem is atrocious!"
I just think that's hilarious.
Love it
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Very Clever
I remember struggling in with my english class in the 8th grade and I still struggle with it today. You won this battle brilliantly, but for me it is a neverending war. GREAT JOB!
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