Having enough form to be graceful,
delicate is out of the question;
what is implied may seem distasteful
but that is a matter of perception.
With just enough style to be worthless,
the price of the work is unknown;
to be measured against what is priceless
the piece takes a place all its own.
Upon enough review to become well known
this art is the form of mankind;
wearing the marks of the way we are thrown;
unfinished, like thoughts on the mind.
Author notes
Looking at these pieces of art is like looking at real people..."real" people. Rough around the edges, and yet, very often, priceless.
Artist: Manuel Neri
A contest entry
- The Beauty of Being Unfinished by Heart Sutra.
1100 points, ended November 30, 2008, 23 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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I like your author's notes and I wish you could find a way to incorporate the idea into the poem so that there did not have to be author's notes! Having said that, the poem has a lot of good points within it and it is on theme with the contest. The opening words of each stanza "with enough of" is weakening the poem. It is not the sort of repetition that strengthens a poem. Maybe try the poem without those two words and see how it reads...
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good entry. it actually makes sense given the visual prompt of the statue. i don't know what neri thought about life, really. but i can glean your thoughts from your art. well done. -silverfish
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This is....
....an outstanding piece of poetry, in my humble opinion, though there's one thing about it which bugs me intensely, and that is the use of the word "of" in the first line of each verse.
There must be a reason for it, though I can't for the life of me fathom what it is!
It makes the piece appear grammatically unsound, and therefore, I only award 3 claps : without the "ofs", I would have awarded forty seven thousand million!
Regards,
Robin.
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Illiteracy
I never tried to give the impression to anyone that I actually knew anything about grammar. I do the best I can. I used the word "of" as a sort of measuring spoon type of thing...a pinch of this, a spoonful of that etc. Is there a better way to get that across, or would it come through without the "of" being there? I didn't realize it was a grammatical problem really, just cumbersome. Thanks much for the comment. I wouldn't mind seeing you list the grammatical rules you refer to when you comment, you seem to know them, and it would be a help.
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Ooof, I love it. Very, very love it.
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Thanks much! This one was a little difficult to put together, after stumbling my way through the last few pieces, I almost gave up for a while. -tired. it happens.
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