In the shadows i lie waiting,
Waiting for my next victim to crush
Crush the hopeful heart that wants love
Love that cant be but full of blood
Blood that i thirst for that will stop the thirst
Thirst burn at the back of my throat so dry
Dry in the cold shadows away from the damp rain
Rain of heart break and tears
Tears i'll never cry for those foolish
Foolish men, young and old that seek
Seek for a hidden beauty that is strickly off limits
Limits that she does not feel
Feel not even in her own heart
Heart breaker BEWARE!
A contest entry
- Standing in the shadows by Just a poet.
1000 points, ended December 5, 2008, 25 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - My one year birthday fantasy bash! by Dark Otter.
1000 points, ended January 22, 38 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Shatter My Soul, Let My Heart Ache by Reaper-117.
1500 points, ended May 27, 106 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - surviving by xochocoholicxo.
779 points, ended July 31, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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Its so true that us girls don't know our limits, and that is part of reason we get hurt from guys that break our hearts to early in life.
Great poem, very powerful. -
Very strongly worded, only negative wouldbe the repetition of thirst unless, of course, thats what you where going for. Good Job either way!!
-Katie
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this is cool..but the colors hurt my eyes. nice job and ow
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thats wicked.
well done on a delicious write
♥ -
I love the way you're just like... Yup, III'm a heartbreaker 8D this is great. A much, much different take on the subject of love ;D hehe.
Welllll done
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Fresh writting within a dark core
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Very nice write ^.^
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great job kool write!!!!!!
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great writing here...I'm on the lookout for that heartbreaker now!!
thanks for the warning! keep upi the great writing. good luck with your contest entry...peace an dlight, Kendal
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a very cool write
the form is most excellent the last first words give extra punch. Forbidden love and the taste of iron laced blood,
to love with courage, very strong poem love it
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Very creative!
I like the form chosen with the last word of each line being the first word of the next. The ending is the title. I enjoy the dark, vampyre genre. You have a good thought in equating a heartbreaker to vampire love. A well written poem that makes a great birthday gift.
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An interesting form idea. And a nicely thought out poem.
Thank-you very much for the entry.
JaP
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