Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

Breathe

Intersection collision,
shards of glass,
exploding in a cacophonous, wayward chance,
mouths dropping,
strangers stop and stare,
in an unrehearsed, collective moment,
don't forget to breathe

Author notes

written 11/20/08

A contest entry

please leave comments,I appreciate the feedback

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments


  • The Fun House silver member
    November 22, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I really like the imagery that this conjures in my brain as I read it. I think you did well with the prompt but the ending seems just a little weak compared to the beginning.


  • Melody in the Embers
    November 20, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Wow, I really like the use of imagery. Good job!


    • MathiasThom
      November 20, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      thanks,I love these short poem contests...Very fun and challenging to write!