Treacherous falsification ,
a misrepresentation of ones true self
Sly, skulking clandestine monster,
ever nearing
with surreptitious stealth
Constrict , compress
Squash , squeeze and press
Intimidated by demons,Influenced thoughts,
Heavy breathing down ones neck
Advancing, the darkness,
Creeping the phase,
Soon out of harmony
Thundering booming and ringing,
Life suddenly,
Erratically and alarmingly,
Wilts as it halts
Author notes
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A contest entry
- Options contest(prewrites accepted) by your angers a gift.
1000 points, ended February 23, 67 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
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This is really amazing. The use of English is masterly and you certainly managed to make it a worthwhile poem to read.
Well done!
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very cool write. Thanks for entering. Good luck!
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Close to perfection as one can get, well thought out piece of poetry. Just wanna ask, is ''Tretacherous'' a word? My dictionary doesn't reconize it as such, closest I get is ''Treacherous''. Is that the word you meant as it does fit. Anyway this poem is awesome with powerful imagery to boot, perhaps the best I've read from you thus far. Very well done indeed and thanks for sharing.
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lst stanza has some outstanding images which begin this advance (nice title 'advancing' ) second stanza has an outstanding verbal sequence at line one and two, and then expands upon their sensations in the final two lines of that stanza ... first line of third stanza begins very effectively a summaction of the advancing aspectts of stanza one and two ... last four lines are perfection ...
this is an fine piece of poetry
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