*
I walk alone in sands and surf fore dawn,
My tears like waves eroding once firm beach,
The sweetest love I know, forever gone.
Untroubled once now thoughts badly withdrawn,
With tongue I dare not use for lucid speech,
I walk alone in sands and surf fore dawn.
For now I am in life the tragic pawn,
I dare ask dealing devils; nay beseech,
The sweetest love I know, forever gone.
To times of warm remembrance I am drawn,
In awe of love’s nuances sensed from each,
I walk alone in sands and surf fore dawn.
I held you many times till nights would yawn,
As dawn’s light would then threaten to impeach,
The sweetest love I know, forever gone.
Make means for martyred man may I move on,
There nothing now this world could ever breach,
I walk alone in sands and surf fore dawn,
The sweetest love I know, forever gone.
*
Walk Alone…Wandika 11-20-2008
Author notes
French Form "Villanelle"
A contest entry
- Lyric Prompt (Eagles Song) by Sandygram.
1200 points, ended December 17, 2008, 6 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 17 of 17
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This was a beautiful Villanelle. I love these lines...
I held you many times till nights would yawn,
As dawn’s light would then threaten to impeach,
The sweetest love I know, forever gone.
Thank you entering my contest. I do appreciate it. It was a pleasure to read your poem. Best of luck. Take care. Sandy
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Thanks Sandy
I am glad you liked it.
I always appreciate what you have to say.
Jim -
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Well it was a nice surprise to see you enter. Thank you. Hope all is well with you. I hope you enjoy the holidays. Smiles and Blessings, Sandy
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But a lovely and sad piece you have brought forward
Excellent take on the prompt
Your Repetition...
"The sweetest love I know, forever gone."
...works very well
Your rhyme is delicate and smooth
Great Villanelle
Wish you the best in the contest
Take care
David
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Thank you
I appreciate your reading and commenting.
Jim
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Beautiful Villanelle my friend. You certainly have that romantic streak flowing. Well done and good luck in this contest.
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Thanks Janice
Hope everything running smoothly your way.
JIm
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Nice work Jim. I liked the imagery and the rhyme structure. GOOD JOB!!!
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Sorry Pat
I have a dark side I slipe into now and again when I write these.
Jim
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Jim ,What made you write this
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Imagination
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''To times of warm remembrance I am drawn,
In awe of love’s nuances sensed from each,''
i loved this section so much
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Thank you
Glad you liked those lines. Always hard to pick the repeating lines then have them make sense. But these fit pretty well.
Jim
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Whew
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Cat got your tongue?
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I love the Villanelle and I love poets that have the skill to pen a good one. This is wonderful in rhyme and meter. I love the passion and emotion you wove into this piece.
Love,
Amera♥
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Thank you
I appreciate your nice words of encouragement.
Jim
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