Gosh boss I know it looks bad,
but there is a good reason
why the petty cash box is empty.
And being a veteran I’m sure you’ll understand
how this is all part of helping our country.
See it is rather complicated,
yet I will tell you the full story,
I’m working for the government
only I can’t prove it
since it is one of those mission impossible deals.
They asked my help to ferret out these aliens communists
who are trying to secretly take over control the world
by using subliminal messages on cable.
Yes, I know communism is supposedly dead,
which makes their plan all the more diabolical.
What does this have to do with our cash box? Just everything!
See they were going to use our company as part of their plan.
True, I appreciate how with us selling office supplies
that seems impossible.
However, pens can be turned into mind control devices,
at least according to THEM.
Are you okay boss, you are looking kind of green?
No worries, I haven’t finished explaining yet.
They asked me to take the money and go to this bar,
it is where those commie alien love to hang out,
real boozers you know.
Then I was to get friendly with this one that looked like a hooker,
even be prepared to take her to a motel,
had to do my patriotic duty.
Here is the receipt for the motel
so you know I’m being a good citizen.
Boy you’re sure are looking really ill,
hope you’re not catching the flu.
Good news is the men in black captured all the aliens thanks to my help.
Waiting on that medal, I’ll show it to you when it comes in.
Oh, and yes they said they will reimburse us for the funds,
have to get back to you on when.
A contest entry
- Excuses, Excuses, Excuses, WHATCHA GOT SOBER OR OTHERWISE by Disturbed Prodigy.
7000 points, ended December 5, 2008, 11 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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Lol, i think i would love to met the person who would believe this, but then again we i was done reading it a strange red flash came in my room,*flash* huh, ummm, keep it flowing and good luck in the contest
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Only you could come up with something like this brother dear!!!!! This really is worthy of the gold.
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AWESOME !!
What a great piece, I didnt want It to end, I love seeing the excuses people can invent, and you just took the cake my friend, lol
Thanks for the laugh
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THAT...was brillantly done!
omg...i knew it!
cable is subliminal control, thanks for the confirm!
looking at my pen...a little learily....
and by the way.......
it sounds like you need a good ole fashioned spanking
for the "hooker" deal....and this granny's got the switch
out to tan your hiney good!
loved your poem,
cleverly written, and your flow was flawless!
thankyou for your entry!
perhaps we should consider voting you into congress!
ears/Seattle
you don't happen to work for a bail out bank do you?
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This seems like exactly what the contest is looking for (atleast the way I get it anyways). Good luck with this write and best of luck in the contest, even though you are competition .
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Only you could come with something like that! What a fun read this one is! Something in this almost rings true of todays society. That is the sad part of it. Love your excuse though..
Best of luck in this contest!
and love
Nyetta
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