after you left i felt so empty
there was so much pain
at least i assume it so
but what i do know
is that when we finally after so long ended
(and you did it in such a cruel way to)
that my life simply blanked
and now i sit here in wonder
of how i lost the memory of a year
it is a great wall of blank
but the cracks and splintered holes
through which i peep
leave me weeping and gnashing teeth
on my bed with the blankets twisted so
and my heartbeat falters so
i thank my mind for its graceful blanking
of that seemingly awful time
as it has allowed me to keep breathing
(and probably living of course)
so i wander around in a slight sense of panic
wondering at the immensity of this problem
because you see i have all these "friends"
who i would never have liked
and all these people who "know" me
who i dont remember having met
so you see my predicament
at having lost my a fair chunk of my memory
you must have destroyed my heart
(which explains why im still crying)
you must have groomed my mind
so that i would not believe nor remember
all that you did to me
why did you have to do that
in such a way to tear me down
but as it probably has saved the thin slice
of sanity that i desperately cling to
but the biggest problem that i am posed with
is not that i cant remember what happned
(although i have no idea what my pin code is)
but the fact that the little piece of my heart
that you left for me to hold on to
has forgotten that i love you
(so i guess i dont)
Oh Wel........
Author notes
before-i-wake
10. i amputated a fragment of my memory to save a failing sense of sanity
i tried to inject a little humor into what i was writing im not sure if its what your looking for but i quite like it....
A contest entry
- Options, Quotes. by LoveDeprived.
700 points, ended December 1, 2008, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Gah. =/ I feel morally obligated to state that I like this poem.
and I feel class obligated to say ' Your style is horrendous' stupid teacher- making me want to say things I don't normally say.
The lack of capitalization on some words bothers me, the lack of stanzas bother me. The lack of punctuation.. bothers me.
=P Never take a class where they try to teach you how to write. My head is so filled with so many rules right now/
But still- the metaphor, the imagery, the sound- the idea. All amazing.
Good luck. -
Very deep
I like this poem it really reflects how I feel...I like very much the way u write! -
OH i do like this poem of yours! I really do. You have a nice flow to it and the emotion in it can almost relate. ^_^ i can tell ya... awesome
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all i can say here is good luck in the contest, i know this is a golden poem keep it flowing
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This is, this is absolutely not what I wanted,
im joking.
I sense that the quote has inspired you, right? Cause this is absolutely(pick out any magnificent word in the "hall of great words"). The depth of this write, the dancing words, the form, it's weird simplicity(i dunno if you meant it this way), is just amazing!. Ahh and yes it may be a small dose of humor, but humor can always be judged as symbolism which imo gives more power in a write. And good that you like your own write, i rarely like mine. Which also means you're hoping something out of this
. Plus good choice of option, I myself like that quote, but could not conjure or get inspired to create such a splendid write like this.
Such a long comment, the finishing touches..
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