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Abusing

Take my wrist thats what i said
Take my money and take my head
Take the food my bodys' fed
Take each breath[[until I'm dead]]

Take each vein, each snort, each line
Come on I dare you, come take mine
(Please don't listen, PLEASE Decline)
Save me quick, I'm out of time

Author notes

Abusing

A contest entry

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Comments

  • kayla.me
    December 1, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    i love this one,,, it is so like it is very high impact!!!


  • The Fun House silver member
    November 22, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This has a high impact when you read it and I do admire the use of rhyme here. Often in rhyming poems they lose the impact in certain situations; this one does not. The only thing I can say is I'm not crazy on the brackets in the first stanza, I do not feel it adds to the piece, but distracts. Other than that it is wonderfully done. This should be added to the "abuse" category I believe due to conetent though. That way the wee ones on the site cannot read it. You should add that category