Maybe
if we hadn't
been so naive,
thinking
the stars and moon
hung
just for us,
perhaps then
it would have been
a happier place
for little boy dreams
to live.
A contest entry
- perhaps by going nowhere.
1400 points, ended November 18, 2008, 8 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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A sad feeling for when their world ends and a child knows a differnet world than he might have. Inscribed with feeling for the path seen and not followed. Congrats on the well earned Bronze sweetheart.
Love,
Sun and stars shine no brighter than you!
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This also reminds me of being a teenage wife and mother. The imagery in your words is so vibrant, I can almost tough it. Congratulations on your bronze cup.
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This reminds me a little of teenage parents, where they believe their love will conquer all, then a child arrives and they disappear and love didn't conquer all in the end. Anyhow, that's just me. perfectly penned. Congratulations on your bronze.
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Oh how beautiful indeed. My congratulations on your gold trophy. You deserve it!
Katz xx
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just beautiful... looking back it is easier to see the clearer picture of things. loved this take on the prompt. thank you
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such a sad piece you have penned. The last stanza washed over me.
Good luck in the contest
Juls
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thinking
the stars and moon
hung
just for us
so haphazardly across night skies
and the dust of nirvana.
How often do we feel like we are the only ones when we fall in love...sigh. Nicely done.
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