Electric mind strung taut.
Glaring headlights burn retinas,
melting in a heated glow.
One more moment of sanity?
Or just another angel chasing
the devil we cannot exorcise?
Flicker of reality caught in
the glint of a disturbed mind,
quickly gone, burnt out brain.
Eager to mold the shape of
thinking gone wrong long ago.
Circles of fire flicker on flesh.
Author notes
The most sane human mind often has "flickers" of madness.
A contest entry
- flicker by Death of the Author.
1000 points, ended December 11, 2008, 20 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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I like your author's note, so very true.
I think the fact you made the lines all the same length sort of removed some of the feeling you can get by laying out a poem.
Electric mind strung taut
glaring headlights burn retinas
melting in
a heated glow.
one more moment of sanity?
etc.
I like a lot of the lines "one more moment of sanity" stuck out as not so good.
Flicker of reality caught in
the glint of a disturbed mind, - really like that part
And also the last line.
Thank you
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Love your thoughs on 'flickers of madness'. Great wording, images and impact. I especially liked,
'One more moment of sanity?
Or just another angel chasing
the devil we cannot exorcise?'
love that phrase - for some reason, to me, it just jumps out!
Nice job!
best wishes in the contest.
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Sanity also implies seeing the injustice others fail to see. It can be the cause of infuriation. It is the multi-facetted nature of inducing impulses that urge to do things that obstruct the progress of souls toward their intended destiny. Though it may seem hugely powerful and overwhelming to many, it is just an insignificant ripple in space time that will fade away and slip into oblivion on the scale of infinity. Thank you for creating and sharing this thought provoking poem. The best of luck in the contest.
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Been there have you?
It has the feel of authenticity and is disturbing to ponder... to feel with your words... "circles of fire flicker on flesh"... Excellent write...
Ken
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A strong and disturbing poem, written with conviction and style.
Good work,
Bill
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Mind is a strange thing and often misinterperts what we see. Too much genius leads it way to madness. Good luck to you in the contest.
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