I am one of many men
in my family
with an illegitimate child.
His mom wants me to
teach him to be strong,
so I enrolled him in
public school.
She asks that I break him
from his timidness,
so I taught him karate.
She asks that I teach him
to respect women,
so I threw out all
of my porn.
She asks that he becomes
a better man than me,
so I teach him to be honest.
She asks that I show him
that it is ok to love,
so I wrote this poem
in hope--
that he will understand.
Author notes
6-Write a dedication to someone
A contest entry
- WRITE! by luna-midnight.
700 points, ended December 16, 2008, 20 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
-
aww wow....wonderful dedication, lovely job and thanks for entering. take care
Stephanie ♥ -
This was so beautiful and touching! Very written...an excellent dedication. He's never forgetting this. Nah-ah. =)
Good luck to you and thank you for entering the contest!
-
i'm in awe. such poignant expression of deep emotions. superb!!!
hebe
-
this was beautiful and deepfelt. I bet this poem will stay in his heart forever
-
I really like this beautiful poignant tribute to your son,it shows your love and dedication for your son,a refreshing read indeed,God Bless,Hazel
-
-
thank u much for reading! yeah im very dedicated to him, although he drives me crazy at times lol. much love and respect to you
-
-
Touching
I like what you've said between the lines, literally!
Moving piece and provoking. I think he will. You seem like you have such a tender heart. I bet your son does too.
luvs,
castaway
PS
guess what? I have 5 sons.
I hope they understand.
-
-
thanks so much for reading. wow 5 sons! omg i know they make u crazy some days yeah? lol much love and respect to you
-
-
WOW! that blew my mind... the ending was NOT what i was expecting and i liked the added sensitivity on this piece ... good luck in the contest and thanks for sharing !!!
-
-
thank u for reading. im really proud of this write because it really is dedicated to my baby boy. thanks for taking a look, much love
-
-
Wow
I really liked this poem. It shows your love and dedication to your son. Wishing that he will grow to become a better person and striving to teach him what is right. Good job. Also thank you for what you said about 'Don't Judge Me' It is very personal and I appreciate your sentiments about what happened. I was really sort of worried about it because I usually don't wright something so raw and I was worried it wasn't as good. -
-
anything u write is gonna be good, and the more raw and real the better. but everyone has different tastes in style, format etc.
but just becuz they dont like it doesnt mean ur poem isnt good, just means they didnt like it. i love your writing, i hope u never stop the scribe!
thanks for taking the time to read mines as well, always a pleasure. much love and respect to you.
-
-
the selflessness in this is wonderful
in one of the stanza's you are missing an 'i'
this was beautiful in its depth of being able to sacrifice yourself for the better of another
-
-
good catch! thanks for that. much love and respect
-
thank u for reading!
"in one of the stanza's you are missing an 'i'" which one? im slow when it comes to editing. -
-
she asks that....I... break him.
that one.
-
-
Adding your comment:
1 - 16 of 16
