Beacon Senryu

Beacon beckon high
perched up in the mind's lighthouse
fingers hurt heart's cry.

Pointed glance for why
and wherefore scans horizon,
hopes answers float by
until sea meets sky,
til haze plays daze with thought maze
echoing soul’s sigh.

Adopt or adapt,
option apt adds attention
rapt to verse unwrapped.

Author notes

robi3_1672_robi3_0000 HXX_EXX

pic Anu http://flickr.com/photos/anua22a/2776200110/

Pic Pigeon Point Lighthouse http://flickr.com/photos/brianmcintyre/2465169805/

In a list

A contest entry

imagery; lighthouse. by Ryno. 400 points, ended November 25, 2008, 14 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest

Comments

1 - 5 of 5

By me, right now

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Jonathan ROBIN
March 26
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Lighthouse link http://www.flickr.com/photos/brianmcintyre/2465169805/
Ryno
November 25, 2008

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I liked this. There was a lot of poetic device, the form worked out well and the word play was good.

I felt you would've had stronger emotion in it, and that you could've relied on adjectives less in a few spots, but, there was some good moments of imagery.

Nicely done! Thanks for the entry.
Cant force beloved
November 15, 2008

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"hopes answers float by
until sea meets sky,
til haze plays daze with thought maze
echoing soul’s sigh."
This part makes me confused, care to explain it for me?
- Jonathan ROBIN
  November 15, 2008
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  Response
  Pointed glance for why
  and wherefore scans horizon,
  hopes answers float by
  until sea meets sky,
  til haze plays daze with thought maze
  echoing soul’s sigh.
  
  Pointed glance is that of the mind and by extension of the lighthouse, scanning horizons hoping for acceptable answers until light and darkness, 'wrong' and 'right' answers, seem to merge without providing solutions
- - Cant force beloved
    November 15, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    
    well then that makes perfect sense, thank you.