May the everlasting peace
existing within be as widespread as the
depths of the ocean.
May the eternal fire in your eyes
burn as bright as a
thousand stars.
May the shimmer or immortal light
dance across your twisting path
ever guiding you
home...
Author notes
I'm not really a praying sort of person, but I wrote this in "memory" of a very close friend who tried to commit suicide recently. Life will never be the same without her...
Is this a good poem???
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
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this is a great tribute to your friend...they were blessed to have a friend like you...thank you for sharing your poem of inspiration...peace and light, kp
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This is a beautiful write. Very emotional and straight from the heart.
I wish you well with dealing with your friend's passing.
-Kati -
The typical platitude of poetry. Try rephrasing items such as thousand stars. Phrases such as those just go to encumber the writing. Making it hard on the mind to follow along.
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Beautiful imagery here! I liked this poem. It's probably as good as a short poem could get. It had origionality and a voice and it brought emotion. Great job!
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good poem
love the poem sorry hear bout ur friend
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Shimmer
Can you explain ? what did you mean by Shimmer
I wish your Friend Be okay and leve the desire t die.
Death is never been easy!
by
the poet of hearts and beautiful words
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VERY GOOD POEM!!!! I think that it sounds like a goodbye, though. I love it, but that is what it does to me....that and makes me sad. Beautiful piece, though! Thanks so much for the share!!!1
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14 years old!
Boy, this is good! - keep writing and your gift will make room for itself.
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wow, theres alot of feeling packed into this short poem. the flow is easily perfect and needs not much of anything else. i think we all come across someone in our lives who we just cant save and this sheads alot of light on that. also, the way you broke it up seems to add more to it. overall great.
and sorry about your friend.
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There's a lot of feeling here, which I personally think makes a great poem. I feel that there could be other words used to make the 'prayer' more personal. 'Widespread' sounds, to me, a bit clumsy. Consider instead 'far-reaching'. I am sorry for what has happened and hope that things get better.
Blessed be. XXX -
Deep, emotional poem coming straight from the heart! A blessing that anyone can wish for for eternal (and internal) peace.
Hope you're friend is alright now and realize what a friend she has in you.
Love,
Rachel.
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thanks, i hope she does...
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AWW that was one of the best i have heard.
you keep on praying and it will be ok.
so good look mate and try to live the rest of your ife.
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thanx, i try...
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To pray for one so lost in negative emotion is very kind. I can feel the honesty in your words here...your true hope and wish for the one this is intended for. I love this piece and I am very sorry for your loss. This is a wonderful write and you have my best wishes. If you need to talk I am here for you.
With all my love
~Secrets
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I'm sorry that your friend tried to commit suicide, I remember when I had those days that I tried as well. Sometimes life can seem too much for many of us.
I hope that they become a strong person. 
Ange
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