under moon glow
laughter of skinny dippers
at the swimming hole.
In a list
A contest entry
- 48 hours to Haiku by azure85.
900 points, ended November 21, 2008, 36 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
As
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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lol. this is a very lovable haiku. its so relaxing, and just speaks life to the readers. congratulations on the bronze and take care!
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Nice
You could, under current conventions, have allowed yourself one more syllable, eg "under the full moon" -
i like this its funny


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a good piece of poetry - ah the fun times of life, to strip away all the daily cares and dive into reflection light.



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Bravo!
Good Ku here haijin!
Glad you won that Bronze.
This is certainly a vivid pix!
IMHO this last line:
at the swimming hole. could stand nicely as:
'swimming hole' I see you were keeping to the trad syllable count here, but as it stands to me this looks more like a 3 line poem than a ku, unless you edit as I suggest. Haiku is going through many morphs don't you think? Some use caps, different syllable counts, punctuation..& here I am giving you suggestions & I'm still working on powerful 'aha' moments!
I enjoyed this!


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under moon glow
laughter of skinny dippers
at the swimming hole.
A little swim in the moonlight, and the sound of nature's delight. A fun haiku, thank you so much.

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Thank you very much for the bronze Any positive consideration from you I feel is a very good compliment
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Very vivid picture I'm getting LOL Great haiku


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a small poem that has a great big idea,lol, keep it flowing my friend, i like you haikus, good luck in the contest
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