A perfect slice of crisp and crunch
Beneath the citrus bittersweet
The taste to tide the day to lunch
My morning treat
The dairy-fair and creamy touch
That holds the snap away from zing
Completes the bite I love so much
It's everything
The wait while heat is crisped away
The expectation built inside
The only way to start the day
Where gods reside
My mother's marmalade on toast
On creamy butter thickly spread
The crowning of this nation's boast
And now I'm fed!
A contest entry
- Help Me Find My Muse! by ourgirlFriday.
550 points, ended December 14, 2008, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Oranges and/or Lemons by Vera Rich.
590 points, ended January 30, 15 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me honestly what you think, good or bad.
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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As the daughter of a proud Englishwoman, there are two things from home that we enjoy on a somewhat daily basis and toast and marmalade is one. (The other, of course, being a steaming cuppa tea!) Within this poem, you were so convincing, that I found myself licking my lips and longing to retreat to the kitchen for a treat! Your rhyme was spot on and seemed to flow very naturally (I'm envious, for I can't rhyme to save my soul!) and the description was so pleasant, that if I closed my eyes, I could practically see myself sitting at the table, in an English kitchen, with mum at the stove preparing my breakfast. What a delight!
Congratulations on the silver shiny!
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OK, so I have visited this before, but not since Vera's contest was announced. My previous comment was "nice", to which I now add "... and congratulations on the silver tassie".
What I love about this poem is its crispness. That's the discipline of the short lines working. Write more like this, bro! -
This is great - I like it a lot. My dad is a fan of the orange marmalade.
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That's pretty good!
Pensive thoughts turn ordinary things into poetic musing; I'm not a morning person, so I don't think I'd be workiing on a ode first thing in the morning. But I do appreciate the subject and the descriptiveness, especially when it's not too metaphorical in device.
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Yummy.
Well done once again hon.
Love you
(glad to see your keeping the majority of ap fed while im gone lol)
Passions
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Now I'm hungry.That isn't at all fair.The one day I decide not to eat bread.Oh I see it's not bread, it's toast.That's all right then.Let me at it
, Ros
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can you hear my stomach growling?
Love, Lane
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Tasty
Mmmmmmmmmm Jeff you have hit on one of the great breakfast pleasures.Yep a Full English takes some beating , but hot buttered toast and marmalade now who could really make the selection between the two?
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Nice.
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This is really really good, superbly crafted, great rhyme, as i now expect from you.But whats amasing is I hate marmalade, and nowI want to try some.IM sure theres a contest at the mo sort of an ode to food, but cant recall who by, if you can find it i bet youd in, this is brill
thanks
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