The depth of the soul,
Its unfathomable.
Follow me down,
Were going off the deep end.
Lets not consider sanity.
Your just letting go.
Seeking silence,
Seeking serenity.
Seeking the life that should be inside of me.
I am falling
…
This is all I need,
Food to eat ,
Air to breathe.
Quench my thirst.
The thirst of my soul.
Dehydrated emotions,
And a withering heart.
Withering and decaying, I’m falling apart.
I am failing
…
Unheard..
Broken beat.
Can you see what I see…
A dimming light inside of me.
I’m stuck,
Unworthy..
Misunderstanding entirely.
I’m going of the deep end.
Wont you join me?
A contest entry
- Defeaning Silence [PROMPTS] by Demmy-Defect.
700 points, ended November 25, 2008, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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first stanza, "were" should be "we're"
last stanza "of" should be "off" and "wont" should be "want"
XD
other than my little technicalities: XD
a very good poem. i'll apologize if my gramatical corrections offend but mispellings always stand out to me.
i loved the perspective of this, however. it was indeed a smidge relaxing.
i especially liked the last bit:
"Want to join me?"
indeed! i do want to join you! when are we leaving? XD
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great job on this poem. i felt like i was taking a trip off the deep end with you. the poem just kept drawing me down, further and further. again, great job and good luck in the contest!

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this is so nice!
keep writing... i can really feel the sadness and it's kinda like lyrics to a song. is it?
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Not nessisarily.. But i had the same thought.
thx moy much -
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your welcome.. wat about my poems? are they amaturish or are they all right?
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1 - 5 of 5




