Chorus:
You take love and throw it away.
Everyone should have known you wouldn't ever stay.
You took my emotions and tore them apart.
A total rape of the heart.
You were my first.
But, to you, I was just another conquest to quench your narcissistic thirst.
You made me feel like your dirty girl.
Just as quickly as you walked in, you walked out of my world.
Chorus
You bask in all the attention.
But, you never return any affection.
I was just another toy in your hands.
And, it was too late before I realized I had fallen for a narcissistic man.
Chorus
Your views on promiscuity are so appalling.
Hurting every girl who has ever ended up falling.
You hit on and make dirty passes for fun.
And, it's way too late before anyone realizes the damage has been done.
Chorus
I tried to tell you I have self respect.
But, my heart I failed to protect.
I put all my feelings for you at stake.
Causing it all to end in heartbreak.
Chorus
Author notes
Dedicated to Awesome.
Once again, hit on means to make a pass, not literal violence. It seems some people were confused about that part in the last poem. Also, this poem is not about rape literally speaking. Just so everyone knows that. Physically, I am fine. 
I just feel a little heart broken, shaken up, not sure really. This past spring and summer in July 2008 for the first time in my life, I showed a guy how much I liked him and I got caught up in the wrong crowd and almost walked straight into danger. Scariest night of my life. Mostly because I'm a virgin and I didn't feel at peace with the guy, not sure why. Something just didn't feel right and then I saw something horrible online after saying respect and I suffered post traumatic stress disorder for months. 
An article that describes the emotional aspect I'm talking about in the poem:
http://www.americanchronicle.com/articles/38716
For those who don't know emotional rape does exist. It's not the same as physical rape, but the implications and aftermath can be just as difficult to deal with.
* once used and abused *
A contest entry
- Because of you I am afraid. (Another sexual abuse contest) by AshleyAesthetic.
400 points, ended June 21, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 20 of 20
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Emotional rape is real. It comes with being physically raped sometimes or by itself and sometimes it can be even worse. Im sorry this happened. Healing is possible, now or in the near future.
Thank you for entering =) -
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Thanks, Ashley. In my case, it came by itself. The emotional part can sometimes be even worse, you're right. I am starting to heal slowly. I joined a church last January and am searching for spiritual healing and just enjoying being around kind hearted people these days. Thanks so much for reading and the nice comment.
Haley Mary
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Emotional rape does indeed exist and on both sides of the gender fence. Emotional rapes scares can run deeper then any other and take much longer to heal .....if they do.
Nicely penned made me think and relive some times best forgotten....
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It can. You know, even though it doesn't happen physically, the emotional trauma can be just as powerful as though it happened in real life. Honestly, I went through post traumatic stress disorder from this incident. Never thought that would happen. Thanks for reading and commenting. Much appreciated.
Haley Mary
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Quite the song!
Well penned...thanks so much for sharing!
Write on!
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Thanks so much for reading.
Haley Mary
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Wow Haley this is quite the verse. I hate people who are like the ones you describe. Totally players and don't give a rat about how much they hurt someones feelings. Awesome lyrics it reminds me of that song called "Total eclispe of the heart" or something like that. You are really good with your lyrical writes. Thanks for sharing, keep writing.
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Thanks, Charley. Yeah, I think the guy is a player. He sure acts like a lady's man from what I've heard him say about himself in his videos.
Yeah, I think I had that Pat Benetar song in my head when I wrote this. classic tune, eh?
You know what's really sad? He made a video talking about how he was going to go seduce another woman the same night that he left that comment in my video. Maybe guys like that just won't ever understand what love is, if he ever did in the first place. Or, is it that I just seemed too good for him in his point of view? I really wish I knew, but the guy hasn't talked to me for months. And, regardless of what people say about women being intuitive, I really don't know what is on that guy's mind. Sometimes I just wish guys would talk more and be open about their thoughts and what they mean when they say something, whether it's said as a joke or as something serious. I mean, if people can't be honest with others, what else have they got?
Thanks so much for reading and commenting. I always appreciate you stopping by.
Haley Mary -
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I knew it!! Pat Benatar, thanks for reminding me. Well after making the comment he did, and then thinking it was cool to tell you he was going to seduce another women, I would try to forget him. As Stevie Nicks sings "players only love you when their playing". These types like to keep scorecards on their productivity, at some point in his life he will get hurt and then perhaps he will relize what he has done. So until he grows up, I would stay clear of him.
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You know what, you're right. Ha, by the time he gets hurt, I'll probably be through college and be a philosopher. I can just imagine it now. Winning the Pulitzer prize or some literary award in Canada for being a great poetess and he will probably look at what I accomplished and think "Damn. She flirted with me all year, I talked dirty rotten to her, she was nice about it and then I walked away from her."
Thanks for the advice, Charley.
Haley Mary
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Awe, I'll kill him. You're the most beautiful and caring person I know. This is a great poem/song. I love it. Your rhyme is natural. It makes me think of how I've felt about guys, that little fear to put yourself out there. Seems when you do it always ends up bad. Keep your chin up, babe, it gets easier eventually.
<3
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Aw, thanks, Austyn. <3
Ha, I don't think you need to kill him. He has enough religious extremists angry at him as it is. Besides, I don't think it's right to kill anyone over something like this. I think you're right that it ends up badly when people put themselves out there. Also, it can depend on the type of guy. It seems I tend to like the bad boys and those kind tend to be the ones who end up breaking hearts. I guess everything was doomed from the start. I'll try to be more cheerful. My poetry has sure started to become darker because of this incident.
Thanks so much for reading and commenting. You're the bestest.
Haley Mary
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Way to go
Way to go with this one, its deep and so very full of emotion. I really "enjoyed the stanza which begins "Your views..." it teaches us the damage that can be done by casual intercourse. Keep churning out the poetry that comes from the heart
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Thanks, Curt. Yeah, the casual relationships people have in society can take it's toll sometimes. Especially when one person wants a casual relationship and another may like the other person more than that, which is basically what this poem is about. It's not about literal rape, but more like a rape of emotions, the devastation of seeing someone just walk away because the guy didn't feel as in love as the girl felt about them. Thanks for stopping by my page and commenting.
Haley Mary
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If these lyrics are about you, I am so sorry.. guys like that are complete pigs. I love the flow of this piece and the phrase "rape of the heart"; it's very fitting. Hope everything is going well and that that guy will someday get his heart broken and know how it feels. Amazing work!
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Thanks. The word rape is only used to mean emotionally, though. Like, I said in the author notes, I am fine. Nothing happened to me physically.
I just use the term as a metaphor to describe heartbreak. It just seemed to fit. Actually, it's funny that you mention it, but that guy who hit on me in July and inspired this piece was dumped by a girl in August. Guess it's true what people say, eh? Karma can be a bitch.
Thanks for reading and commenting.
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Oh My Word~
A Powerful piece which tugs hard like all Your pieces~ for some reason while reading this I kept seeing an eclipse~ but also like a black mass in the shadows~
Strong Voice once again Beautiful One!!
More need to hear
Thank You for sharing Your Heart and Wisdom~
Many blessings to You in all You do Sweet Soul
Best wishes too
with much love & light~ Desire~*~
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Thanks, Desire. This is actually one of my most personal pieces, so I'm glad you read. An eclipse is interesting. It was more about telling about an incident I had with someone on youtube and it's crazy. You think you can get a sense of what people are about, but some just have this Jekyll and Hyde persona and it's very hard to know the truth some days. There are times when I still don't want to believe that his words were his true intentions, but let's just say it was part of the reason why I didn't go to 888. All my friends on there weren't going, so I felt it would have been dangerous for me to go by myself, you know?
I'm glad he lives in the U.S. , far away from me. I think he has a problem with women, though. I think he feels unloved by his mother or something. He said that he doesn't get along with her. So, he goes and takes out his frustrations on an innocent girl like me who actually had a crush on him. Cruel, eh?
Oh well, in August he got dumped by a girl so I guess it's true what they say. Karma can be a bitch and it catches up to people. He will probably end up alone and depressed some day. Then, he will start wondering where all his women went. And, he threw away the one woman who liked him first before he had to approach. I swear, if I ever have to write an essay in a psychology class about human behavior, it will be about this guy's persona. He's one messed up individual. Now it gets me thinking. I wonder, is there a relation between narcissism and panic disorder?
Thanks for the comment and support, Desire. It's much appreciated. More than I can express. *hugs*
Haley Mary
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You don't need an article to explain what you described so well.
Sorry you got your heart crushed.
Uncle Bud
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Thanks, Uncle Buddy. You know what's really sad about the whole thing is I actually liked this guy a lot and for the first time in my life, I showed how much I liked a guy. But, I feel I also have learned from this, too. I don't think narcissists can ever love, and probably they don't even know what love is. Which reminds me, I was telling a friend of mine on youtube the other day who had someone be really mean to them and I said that karma will probably eventually catch up to people and bite them in the behind. Too bad I can't think of these sorts of things to tell myself when my heart gets broken. But, writing it out in poetry sometimes helps. Thanks for the hugs and the comment. Makes me feel a little better.
Your Niece,
Haley Mary
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