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Autumn Dreams

Why should our love

Be so wrong

My years are many

Yours not so long

 

Why should we

Be kept apart

When we hold

Each others heart

 

Society tells us

We cannot be

Our love is forbidden

By numbers you see

 

We will find another

In time no doubt

We have sweet memories

To forever dream about

Author notes

By ~ Maxboy
Background ~ Autumn Dreams By ~ Little Eagle
Prompt ~ The Question ~ "Why"

......................YouNobleIvory Contest~"read prompt"


Silver, Bronze, HM

In a list

A contest entry

~PLEASE COMMENT~

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 53 of 53

  • FlipperSwitch
    July 25

    Edit | Reply
    This has a creative idea about it, but you could do so much more to improve it. With a subject like this you can extend and broaden your detailing- I'd like to see this a bit more in depth.


  • SizzyFid
    July 1

    Edit | Reply
    So, this is about an age difference that prevents a love, or have I got completely the wrong end of the stick here? X3

    I really adore the concept of this poem. Such a sweet little piece. Short, cute rhyme... Nothing to complicated. It's as if you're saying "this is love, and that's that."

    I was impressed, indeed. Come to the next round. You made the finalists.

    Congrats! x


    • Maxboy gold member
      July 1
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you very much for your wonderful comment, I am happy you liked my write and yes you had it right about the age difference.

      Thanks


  • The Falls Sun
    June 26
    Edit | Reply
    A interesting poem. I liked as far meaning, very inspirational. BUt I have to say as far a rhyme goes it seemed a little too stressed.
    ex.
    Society tells us
    We cannot be
    Our love is forbidden
    By numbers you see


    idk if it is just me, i dont understand this stanza. What does numbers have to do with society telling you, you can never be together?

    Other than that stanza, excellent poem.

  • XxLoverOfDarknessxX
    June 24

    Edit | Reply
    amazing!!! i loved this! excellent take on the song! just....WOW! i loved this!! keep up the good work! thanks for entering and good luck in my contest!

    • Maxboy gold member
      June 25
      Edit | Reply

      !!! Thank You So Much !!!

      For the Bronze Trophy and your beautiful comment, most of all, I am greatful you enjoyed my write.

      Thank You


  • Salty Hibiscus gold member
    February 1

    Edit | Reply
    that's a great poem! sigh, i wonder what's wrong with our society. i believe in human rights, and they still take some of our rights away. tsk. thanks for sharing and good luck.


    • Maxboy gold member
      February 1
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you very much for your wonderful comment, I am pleased you enjoyed my write.

      Thanks


  • HereComesTheSun
    February 1

    Edit | Reply
    to me this had hope at the end which is a great message but in this contest i dont want hope. i dont want a rainbow i just want dark gray clouds poring down heartbreaks rain


    • Maxboy gold member
      February 13
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for your comment, next time I will try to give you gray clouds and no hope.



  • DecorusApparatus
    January 30

    Edit | Reply
    I liked this, some simplistic poems are definitely good to read. Great rhyme scheme, pretty flawless.
    I also liked the message, I've often thought that myself, being interested in those older than me.
    Keep up the excellent writing!!

    --Stardust xx


    • Maxboy gold member
      January 30

      Edit | Reply
      Thank you so much for your wonderful comment, I am pleased you enjoyed my write.



  • incondite
    January 27
    Edit | Reply
    Thank you for your entry and good luck


  • Unknowing...
    January 22
    Edit | Reply
    im not sure how this is forbidden or broken sorry.


  • doolie gold member
    January 13

    Edit | Reply
    A beautiful and heartfelt write sweetie.

    Good luck in the contest.


    • Maxboy gold member
      January 13
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you very much sweetie for your warm comment, I am happy you liked my write.



  • maralisa silver member
    January 13
    Edit | Reply
    a beautiful take on the promt good luck in the contestmaralisa


    • Maxboy gold member
      January 13
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for your wonderful comment, I am pleased you liked my write.



  • daviscth silver member
    January 12

    Edit | Reply
    this is such a beautiful and thoughtful poem. I love your imagery. Thanks so much for sharing in my contest and please don't forget to post the prompt.

    • Maxboy gold member
      January 26
      Edit | Reply

      !! WOW !!

      Thank you ever so much Cathy, for the Silver Trophy, but I am most pleased with the fact you liked my poem so much.

      Thanks Again


    • Maxboy gold member
      January 13
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you so much for your beautiful comment, I am happy you liked my write.



  • PaintedParisPassion
    December 23, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    The backgroud is neat, but it makes it kind of hard to read the text. But i do love your words. So sad that society makes people feel this way. Great job of expressing this. Thanks for entering and good luck! Keep writing and thanks for sharing!

    Peace and Love
    -B


    • Maxboy gold member
      December 23, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      I am very pleased you enjoyed my poem, thank you very much for your wonderful comment.



  • Fallen-Phases
    December 12, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    i loved the rhyme scheme in this...the first to have one. its touching on a level that i could never capture, perfect write, best of luck


    • Maxboy gold member
      December 12, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for the applause and your wonderful comment, I am pleased you enjoyed my write.



  • sunflowers21573
    November 20, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is so wonderfully written. Your background also is just stunning to go along with the title. Great job.


    • Maxboy gold member
      November 20, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you so much for the applause and your wonderful comment, I am so pleased you enjoyed my poem.



  • Cynthia Gaines gold member
    November 16, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Beautiful Melancholy...

    Thank you for sharing your muse's creative juices, Max!! Good job!!


    • Maxboy gold member
      November 16, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you so much Cyn, I am very happy you enjoyed my poem.

      Thank You


  • Ms Sexy silver member
    November 15, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    This was cute love is a battle though


    • Maxboy gold member
      November 15, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks girl, I appreciate the applause and comment. I am happy you liked it. How have you been?



  • Meroza
    November 14, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is a deep poem, so full of love yet sorrow for what is "right and wrong" in the eyes of the society. I've never rally cared about those rules, I'm rather found of breaking them whenever I can >:3

    Congrats on the shiny and the best of luck in the next contest.

    • Maxboy gold member
      November 14, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for the applause and wonderful comment, I am happy you liked my poem. You would be the one to break the rules, after all, you are the Defiant Nordic Princess.



  • aien aristeuein
    November 14, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Good poem.
    Thanks.


  • Scyphon
    November 14, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Yes, we are asked many questions and we ask many more. Especially when we are denied what we want and desire. Love so pure should never be told no. Beautiful poem, thank you for entering.

    • Maxboy gold member
      November 14, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you so much for the Honorable Mention, I am pleased you enjoyed my poem. I do appreciate your applause and wonderful comment.

      Thank You Again


  • LadyDementia gold member
    November 14, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Beautifully done, the emotions are superb here. Shame how many ships pass in the night because of what society dictates. It dictates far to much if you ask me! Very neat read hunni good luck in the contest


    • Maxboy gold member
      November 14, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you so much for the applause and your wonderful comment, I am very happy you enjoyed my poem.



  • Pearl-1
    November 14, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Awwww this is so lovely
    age really don't matter
    when your in love
    good luck in the contest
    June


    • Maxboy gold member
      November 14, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you June, for the applause and your wonderful comment, I am pleased you enjoyed my poem.



  • Ziola
    November 13, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    this is absolutely beautiful. it was sure hard on my fathers family, when he married my mother who is 13 yrs older.

    • Maxboy gold member
      November 13, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks, I really appreciate the applause and your wonderful comment. I am pleased you liked it. Yes, there are unspoken rules society imposes beyond the actual laws, as acceptable to them.



  • GypsySyah
    November 13, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Awww!

    How sweetly worded, and touching too. I agree that society is the imposer of "acceptable" age differences. As long as both are adults, who should care or judge? Gezz. Anyways, nice write. Peace- Syah


    • Maxboy gold member
      November 13, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you so much for the applause and wonderful comment, I am happy you liked my poem.


  • angeldreams
    November 13, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    Beautiful.

    Short yet touching!
    Simply loved it.
    Thanks for sharing n all the best for contest.


  • splinteroflight.
    November 13, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Love love love it.

    This is immense, it really demonstrates the unfairness of society's prejudice against age difference relationships!
    Good luck in the contest
    <3<3<3


    • Maxboy gold member
      November 13, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you so much for your wonderful comment, I am very pleased you enjoyed my poem.



  • My Milieu
    November 13, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    I like this Don, it's pretty.


    • Maxboy gold member
      November 13, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you El, for your applause and nice comment.


1 - 53 of 53