Past crumbles behind me
overgrown with lies,
hidden in thorns
that ripped my life into ruins.
A shell remains
still standing,
open scars visible to all.
Secluded and alone,
I fall to pieces
surrounded by betrayals;
tangled weeds woven with pain
run wild, overgrown,
freely watered with tears.
A solitary shambles of desolation
draws looks from the lost,
who have wandered here
in their own confusion.
Author notes
please credit the picture. Do_You_Seek_the_Castle__by_RedAnalysis
just thoughts
A contest entry
- What do you See.... Picture Prompt by Angelflower.
700 points, ended December 3, 2008, 12 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 26 of 26
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Beautiful and emotional. I love how this played out. How it grabbed the reader and tugged on heartstrings. you did such a wonderful job with this prompt. thank you very much for sharing. best of luck in the contest.
Angel
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Thank you so much 'Angelflower' - glad you enjoyed this. I'm really not sure where these thoughts even came from....lol.....inspiring picture, I guess.
Thank you so much for the Bronze!
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So true
We as human beings so feels the spritites of others alive and we unknowingly embrace one anothers fears unknowingly by a single glance but havent yet learned how to face them thus we walk on by leaving the down in heart still to walk alone . Reach out and find the joys within our own grasp
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Thank you 'stories' for your lovely comment. I'm glad you enjoyed this.
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Extraodinary write, enjoyable read, excellent take on the prompt.
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Thank you so much 'DolceVito' for reading and your lovely comment. I am pleased you liked my thoughts.
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Wonderful
Very creative and so well expressed. Best of luck in the contest.
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Thank you 'penman' - glad you enjoyed this.
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Excellent
Ohhh I like the way you took this prompt and went with it. So emotional and I can relate to it so well. All the best in the contest, Michele
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Thank you so much 'mountain-woman' - I am glad you liked this.
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Excellent! A dark take on the picture! Wonderfully done and the metaphor in this is prefectly constructed!
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Thank you kiwi - glad you liked this!
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Love this...
Fantastic work...
Great metaphor & wordplay/choice/use, flows wonderfully with a dark sad undertone that was simply compelling...
Well done!!!
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Thank you so much 'Fritz..' - I'm pleased you liked this 'dark' take.
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Wow! Love how you did this, your take on the picture is awesome! Such sadness carried within each word, yet beautifully penned. Has to be my new fave from you
A stunning read, good luck in the contest 
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thank you LadyD - glad you really liked this.
I hadn't planned on 'dark' - just kind of came out that way....lol
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nice take on the picture, love this sad but well depicted poem, good luck in this contest also
Linda
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Thank you Linda - glad you liked this.
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This is so very deep and speaks straight to the heart. You've done wonderful with that picture there and gave it justice.
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Thank you so much 'Hekate' - glad you enjoyed this.
(I LOVE your avatar!!!)
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I adore this! I feel every word and each emotion deeply my friend! I love the background and font colors you chose to compliment this lovely pic. This is just plain amazing!!!
Az
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Thank you Az - glad you liked this.
I 'wanted' a nice, nature-type, old castle, write....lol....."this" is what I got!
so glad you enjoyed this.
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wow, this is incredible.. the 3rd and 4th stanzas were my favorite ones.. the imagery is fantastic, with a dark overtone... excellent job with both your poem & this prompt
good luck
kat
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Thanks kat - glad you liked this.
I wanted a nice nature-type, castle in the wilderness write....lol....this is what my thoughts sent instead...
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Oh Yeah I like this oh the third and fourth stanzas are amazing thanks for sharing good luck in the contest be well
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Thank you Starz - glad you liked this.
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