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night fire

I wear you like fire
the cloak of your skin
a sunspot in the night
your waves of flame
combust me
into molten copper
glowing lips brand mine
your breath in me
blisters my lungs
my heart pumps flame
bones melt
my soul in ashes

the fire of you
engulfs me
transforms me
to light and heat
and sparks rise
like stars in the night –

now living only
in the center
of your flame

































A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 11 of 11

  • Draig aine gold member
    December 13, 2008

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    led by the light

    so beautiful

    the fire of you
    engulfs me
    transforms me
    to light and heat
    and sparks rise
    like stars in the night –


  • Heart Sutra
    November 29, 2008
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    Beautiful ~ !

    You did a lot with the contest theme.


  • PerfectImperfection
    November 18, 2008

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    This is an alluring piece of devotion and intensity throughout. The references are strong and solid, reflecting the love proclaimed and that bit of weakness once embraced. Very well spoken! The repetition of 'flame' indeed confessing the essence of severity - the fevers which dance, and the passion ensued. Great write!


  • myrataal silver member
    November 18, 2008

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    I loved the passion in this write ...

    and the overwhelming feelings it instigates ... but for some reason the soot and smoke do not belong in this poem ... I wish this passion to be clear and purifying; burning eternally; burning right into the Core of Being. Yes. Forever in the center of the flame.


    Myra


    • CaliOkie silver member
      November 18, 2008

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      Thank you for your comment. You are correct, soot and smoke will now be light and heat. Your talent and instincts are in good form -- I think this one reads a little better now.

      Garrison


  • Dalaney gold member
    November 16, 2008

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    very romantic...pure heat in this sensual write. Okay, I am now wide awake and ready to rumble My best wishes for you in the contest, Garrison. Love, Lane

  • a n e s t h e s ia
    November 13, 2008
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    "the cloak of your skin"

    Smouldering.

    Great impact in the ending.


  • Nicolette gold member
    November 13, 2008

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    This is the way to go up in flames! Loved the progression, the burning sensation here and especialy the closing lines, Garrison - lovely.

    ~ Nicolette


  • tara wilson gold member
    November 13, 2008
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    • CaliOkie silver member
      November 13, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Your instincts are flawless. Thank you. Your suggestions and inspiration are always perfect. This is just one of many I owe you.

      Garrison

1 - 11 of 11