I realized all of life is lived through symmetry.
It was 3am when I discovered that I could never love him
like he deserved.
Just like it was 3am when I knew that I had found love in you
[trust me, it's not what I wanted either].
Finally, 3am [once again], and I have realized that
I will never make you love me back.
I've smoked too many cigarettes and found too many flaws in the stars
laying with you in oblivion.
And I've given up so much of me [of the parts of me I loved]
to give you one more reason to carry on.
I guess I'm saying that eventually you will see
that when I said I cared about you enough for both of us,
I really had to.
It wasn't because I wanted to, believe me.
[I just wanted to close my eyes and cover my ears.]
It was because I couldn't shake that feeling;
I couldn't sleep while staring in your soul.
Maybe one day, maybe one day,
you'll know what it was like to have to worry over you.
I was always scared, baby, I could never sleep.
You don't understand that when you say "don't worry"
[I always will] I have to finally listen.
And don't you, for one second,
try to pretend that you didn't ache for someone to notice
[beg for someone to love] you.
Don't pretend that you didn't cry when you read and heard
my letters, my poetry, my screaming at you.
I know you started hurting yesterday afternoon
when you found out that I was going to move on without you.
You can't hide from that fact,
just like you could never find it in your heart to care.
You'll regret this one day [just like I do now].
Author notes
For him.
A contest entry
- the catharsis rounds; auditions. by aanika.
1800 points, ended February 10, 43 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
*sigh*
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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yes.
thanks for entering. -
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Thanks for the yes. =]
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yes.
Please wait for the other judges comment. -
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Word. Thank you. =]
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this was pretty good.
I felt the emotion, which means that you'd probably do well in this contest.
however, I didn't like the square brackets; I felt like you could have found a better way to convey the same message.
thanks for entering
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This is my personal comment for the catharsis rounds.
Upon the closing of the contest, I will comment back with a 'yes' or 'no.'
That being said, I liked this.
I really liked your first 4 stanzas, though after that it seemed a bit dull in comparison.
I think the word "baby" was a bit overused, and it seemed that some emotions and ideas were a bit repetitive in the second half of your poem.
I liked this, overall.
I'll be back. =]
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You really seem hung up(may I say that?).
"I've smoked too many cigarettes and found too many flaws in the stars
laying with you in oblivion.
And I've given up so much of me [of the parts of me I loved]
to give you one more reason to carry on."
that verse was beautiful. really, it was.
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Yeah, you can def say that. It was totally true.
Thanks for the comment, it's appreciated. =]
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awww this is so sweet.
it gave me chills. i know this feeling all too well.
the last three stanzas are my favorites!
i really enjoyed reading this.
your Faerie
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damn girl;;
if this isnt taken from my brain and arranged brilliantly onto paper.
"And I've given up so much of me [of the parts of me I loved]
to give you one more reason to carry on."
oh god;; yes i have.
"You don't understand that when you say "don't worry"
[I always will]"
there's no way you can't not worry.
"just like you could never find it in your heart to care."
i know he does..just not as much as i do him.
oh boy did this hit me like a ton of bricks.
great job doll.
♥ ♥
[[alexsis]]
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THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR COMMENT!
It made me feel goooooood. =]
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