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Because You Smiled

If at times you feel you want to cry,
And life seems such a trial,
Above the cloud there's a bright blue sky,
So make your tears a smile,

As you travel on life's way,
With its many ups and downs,
Remember its quite true to say,
One smile is worth a dozen frowns,

Among the world’s expensive things,
A smile is very cheap,
So when you give a smile away,
You get one back to keep,

Happiness comes at time to all,
But sadness comes “unhidden”,
And sometime our tears must fall,
Behind our laugher hidden,

So when our friends have a sadness face,
And their troubles around them pilled,
The world will seem a better place,
And all because you smiled,

What do you thing?

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Comments

1 - 18 of 18
  • This really makes me smile ... I like that you wrote something this happy because it really impacts others who reads it.

  • sweet , love it !!

  • Awww this is so cutee!...
    I agree that not all the smiles have gone... in fact its very odd when i myself dont have one plastered over my face.
    I really did enjoy this piece, and it did put a smile on my face. Bravo. =D


  • Thata
    March 13
    Edit | Reply
    im smiling! just as a smile, your poem is so therapeutic.


  • nikoshiana
    March 2
    Edit | Reply
    So sweet

  • rica3390
    February 27

    Edit | Reply

    I really enjoyed this poem

    I really enjoyed reading your poem. It kind of reminds me of telling my friend to smile when they didn't feel like it but eventually they did and felt better afterwards . Thanks for sharing.


  • Gwenevere
    February 23
    Edit | Reply
    I'm smiling now after reading your lovely poem , Ros


  • Yah-rod
    February 19

    Edit | Reply
    Stanzas 1 and 3 stand out for me. They're the most rhythmical (syllable-count is consistent) and their message is beautifully expressed. The rest is impressive, and doesn't need much to make it better..."As you travel on life's way" might fit in a little easier if you changed it to something like "As you travel a lifetime's way"...and the "its" in the next line isn't really needed (for me anyway).

    "And sometime our tears must fall" could be "And sometimes too our tears must fall".

    Other than that, this poem goes really nicely. The message is clear, and most importantly the tone is optimistic and almost jumpy ..that's why I mentioned the awkward areas..but it's up to you if you change them.

    Good work

    Jared


  • guardianhost gold member
    February 18
    Edit | Reply

    enchanting verses

    Delightful - enjoyable read

  • writerintoodeep
    February 13
    Edit | Reply

    Bomb-diggaty

    I loved how you creatively used rhyme, and it was so sweet.
    Wonderful.
    Keep it up :]

  • I really like this poem! It's very beautiful and the rhyme scheme feels very natural and not at all forced. Great write!


  • Sandi Alford gold member
    January 13

    Edit | Reply

    Wonderful outlook

    and a most cost effective way to add a little sun to someone else's day. A delightful verse to read this morning and yup, I smiled!

    Thank you for the sunshine to start the day, let the ink flow!

    many blessings, Sandi


  • MargaretG
    January 13

    Edit | Reply

    I like it

    I like the attitude of helping one another to feel better by sharing affection and smiles. You are right, they mean a lot, even though they cost nothing.
    The verse is simple and direct, which helps you to give this message clearly. The rhymes are mostly good, though instead of "unhidden", may I suggest "unbidden" (unasked). There is a typo in line 2 of the last stanza (piled), but it does not detract from my enjoyment of this poem. Well done!


  • kitty23
    November 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    very good
    i like the way you look at life not alot of people can look past all the bad we have among us anymore cause it has become so overwhelming

    this is very true
    thank you for spreading your joy
    and prespective on this subject

    kitty23

  • XxMGxX
    November 21, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    claps claps claps

    wow ...so meaning full but simple in its word, salam Mr.poet salam ...


  • Ahkam silver member
    November 12, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    wonderful

    Hey Mr. poet dont tell me that you have written this poem....its unbelievably beautiful simple and sweet.I don't know how and when your words and thoughts got this much sweet and soft, very nice work. keep it up


  • rhondasail
    November 12, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    You have indeed made me smile with this gentle poem of cajoling warmth..thank you. Peace always, Rhonda

  • Gwenevere
    November 12, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Yes, a smile can brighten the darkest day.Two typo's trial not trail and piles not piled.A great sentiment you have written here, Ros

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