ketchup stains and beachfront parades
as odes to soldiers, dead by battles and guns;
the sinking red liquid sun
like cherries in melted sugar lemonade.
this is the way the world will end,
i hear my grandmother say, under her breath -
while she knits stockings for her dead
children and dogs and presidents.
the hollow sound of the respirator
as it pumps air into a body that will collapse
like matchsticks
under a pile of bricks.
and lovers love to play like they're at war
and war gives blood to the sadists we are
so everyone is just as satisfied -
shot, heart-strewn, to the soaked ground.
this must be the way the world will end,
i hear them say,
in the quiet breaths
and then, silence.
Author notes
the t.s. eliot quote really inspired me for the them for the rest of the poem as well, the option was the quote
“This is the way the world ends
This is the way the world ends
This is the way the world ends
Not with a bang but a whimper”
~T.S. Eliot
A contest entry
- I just want brilliance by ShannonLea.
1000 points, ended November 15, 2008, 10 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
-
Pretty good!
I like how you connected everything together without leaving me confused and I absolutely loved - and lovers love to play like they're at war
and war gives blood to the sadists we areand lovers love to play like they're at war
and war gives blood to the sadists we are... They're my favourite lines. -
didn't realize i had already clicked. sorry.
-
congratulations on the bronze trophy you have earned with this write. thank you for sharing this sad, but wonderful, write with me today. i am looking forward to reading more from you in the near future. viyanna rosemarie
-
Lower case is great way of emphasising the whimpering analogy great work exceptforthis. Medical care is very important, and I'm sure Obahma could be persuaded with a knitted jumper. Great poem, the form is interesting however I am not big on all the different types of forms, is this anything specific? I see on further inspection you have repeated the world will end, well done, and T.S Eliot iz cool.
-
Wow, so heartfelt and emotional. Very nicely done. And I love the fact that it is so full of imagery, it is very interesting to read a poem that gives you a mental image of watching a movie...few can pull it off, but you did okay on this one
ASM
AKA Raymond -
A good entry!
that fulfills the prompt well with some excellent metaphor. The last stanza most appropriate.
Adding your comment:
1 - 6 of 6
