I often wonder
how far in space
we would’ve come,
if Jules Verne hadn’t written
“Earth to the Moon” in 1865.
And would we have ever postulated
that space could be “folded”
if Frank Herbert hadn’t written
“Dune” in 1965?
Prophets both,
100 years apart,
But dreamers and
Writers first.
That folding of space was the only way we Terrans could have arrived half-way across the galaxy within my lifetime, and negotiated with the three primary governments of the planet Morneth to permit a space-lab, since they would not allow any research facility to be built on the surface. We could observe, take samples of non-living or no longer living organisms, and begin to build relationships with representatives of the government. So far, the extent of sentient beings had astonished us. I was currently playing Fossi to the Gripitchi, many of whom I had named and followed for months, when I came upon a small group in great distress.
The gripitch Semi had fallen from the high embankment around his water-village. Nothing broken, but the fall had stunned the six chambered muscle which served as his heart, and it had stopped pumping. The pale feathery air-gills at the base of his neck were turning black, and his huddle mates gazed up at me, pleading, mewling piteous little sounds, green viscous tears flowing from their thrice-lidded eyes.
I shook my head and sighed deeply: Despite our best intentions on non-interference, we were forever being dragged into planet cultures. I pulled on my electro-magnetic gloves and keyed the cuffs to defibrillate. Bending down, I put one index finger on Semi’s thorax and the other above his pelvis and activated the gloves. Semi lurched, his eyes opened and the crowd’s mewling turned to chirps of amazement, pleasure, and awe.
I activated the anti-grav lifter
and floated over the embankment,
away from the Gripitchi village,
toward the shuttle
which would return me to my lab.
I wondered what new legend
the Gripitchi would now invent,
about the giant gods who swam in the air
and raised the dead.
Do all the Lazarus stories start like this?
It was as I lifted away
that a sharp cyclonic wind caught the lifter
and tossed it like a straw hat against the cliff.
All I remember thinking, was,
oh, shit, I have to die
before I can become a god!
Then nothing,
blankness,
a cold descending dark.
Author notes
Fourth in the Middle of the Story series.
In a list
A contest entry
- Sci Fi/Fantasy Extravaganza II by Dark Otter.
700 points, ended December 5, 2008, 9 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 23 of 23
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I'm glad you earned a bronze with this installment of your story, Lita. I, too, was enamored of the "Dune" series, with its breadth and scope. 
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Ohmygosh! This is even better than I imagined. Loved the lines, "I pulled on my electro-magnetic gloves and keyed the cuffs to defibrillate." haha, very, very clever. Your skill and background knowledge adds such dimension to this story. I have to say that I have now read (I believe) the entire series and this has been the most engaging in so many ways. You have one heck of a story in your capable hands. What a magnificent piece of work here. I'm amazed and engulfed in the wonder of it. You've really 'activated' my imagination (and I thought I had a decent imagination? wow...).
AsIThink...
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Thank you so much for reading the whole thing ( I hope it wasn't like "eating the whole thing (that meatball commercial where the guy needed Alka-Selzer!) I am working on the next installment, in between thinking about oceanic puns...
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How funny is this? lol. "oceanic puns..." (lol - love your sense of humor. I hope that you've seen my earlier comments about this ref. this morning). And you are welcome of course.
AsIThink...
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Ah Dune
yes, we must die to become Gods
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Very good!
Well written, it did feel like I was there. -
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Thanks for reading; obviously, it is still a work in progress!
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Astounded!
You certainly know how to write a story very well. I was captivated the whole way through. You have a vivid sense of imagination and are able to convey your thoughts through your words with such fluidity. You say this is the fourth in a series you have written, yet without reading any of the other installments, I was easily able to hook into the ideas of the story.
You mix the human element with the alien life forms well, which I think makes the story more easy to relate to. I loved the thoughts in your ending here too. Superb write...alby
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I always appreciate your comments, Alby. They help me to keep on writing, even on days when all I really want to do is curl up and go back to bed! Like today when it is about 0 degrees C. here and even sitting with the cat in the window absorbing the sunshine, feels cold...
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wow I love it!!! You did a fantastic job writing this piece!!! This is so truly amazing and so very very well written!!! I love the flow in this story its perfect!!! You did a beautiful job!!! Your details and descriptions are so very amazing and your portrayal is magnificent!!! Very very well written!!!! I love your word choice!!! You are truly a brilliant writer with a lot of talent I must say!!!! This is an amazing incredible piece!!!!!!!
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Thank you so much -- I'm glad that you don't mind mixing some prose with poetry -- it's just how it came out!
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Now I am completely hooked, you have a very vivid imagination and I love sci-fi, so I hope you will keep me entertained for hours
More...More...More
Sue
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Thank you so much, Sue -- I'm working on the next section, as well as a couple of contests. AP and the friends I've made here have really helped get me back in the groove. Your remarks are especially kind and helpful
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:P
I love your imagination, this is an incredibly creative write, insightful and intriguing. It just goes to show there is poetry in prose
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Thank you so much for stopping by! It just came out this way, a mix of prose and poetry -- so far no one has objected TOO much!
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WOW!
Lady you have me completely entranced in this fantastical world of yours! and probably what I love
the most is how very coherently you've woven this story! My guess is as a child in school science was your favorite subject?..if not then surely science fiction is!!
excellent was again.
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Well, actually, I loved chemistry, but it didn't like me very much. My college teacher (who was a great teacher and I never missed her classes because they were so enjoyable and astonishing) actually offered to give me a "C" for the first semester when I got a "D-" on the course final, if I would promise NOT to take the second semester -- she didn't want to fail me! LOL - a woman ahead of her time! The biology and neuro I had to take later were easier, but not nearly as much fun. And yes, I am a great Sci-Fi fanatic...I wish I would live long enough to see people actually make it out of the solar system... In the meantime, I guess I will just have to fantasize! Thank you, S. for reading, I do appreciate your comments!
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Wow!!!...I love this,this had me hooked from
start to end,very fascinating and interesting indeed and in my opinion a great masterpiece!!!,Hazel
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Very interesting write. I enjoyed reading it. Thank you very much. My favorite is the last stanza of this poem. Thank you for sharing
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Beautiful
Very nicely written
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This is a tantalizing segment of story; whole new worlds exist here, ready for exploration. A good write, involving from the first words, and promising elucidation of thought-provoking subjects.
I like very much the realisation in 'oh, shit, I have to die
before I can become a god!'
I'll have to read more of the series.
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Your writing is astounding! There's so much food for thought in your far-reaching ideas. I'm especially drawn to the idea of the power to heal and have just qualified as a Herbalist for that reason.
'Semi lurched, his eyes opened and the crowd’s mewling turned to chirps of amazement, pleasure, and awe.'
The Comfrey ointment I made and gave a friend for her painful slipped disc worked and took the pain away!
If we have the power to do something we must do it and it seems your protagonists understands this concept.
Peace Georgia
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I am a firm believer in natural medicine, and herbal remedies -- I think we have just begun to rediscover what older generations knew, and there has been a good beginning with the Herbalist and Naturopathic movements. Good luck in using your knowledge to helping others.
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