Once upon a time I thought that we were forever,
I was sure that we would never part,
and so I put my hard-won trust and faith in you,
but in return you went and broke my heart.
You walked away from me to someone else's bed,
you left me crying on the cold hard ground,
so why would you be thinking after all this time,
you could call me up and say "Come around"?
'Cause I was just another notch in your bedpost, baby,
I was just another pawn in your game,
I was just another stroke on the tally, darling,
I was just your fifteen minutes of fame.
And now you're begging me, "Honey, give me one more chance,
let me rock your world just once more tonight" -
but I was just another notch in your bedpost, babe,
and I'm much happier now you're out of sight!
Were you expecting me to forget all of my self-respect,
come crawling back and leave my morals behind?
Were you thinking I would fall into your arms once again?
If you were thinking that, you must have been blind.
Because I know what I am worth to a decent man now,
he doesn't treat me like a well-kept whore,
you walk in here thinking to talk your way into bed -
but honey, all that you'll be finding is the door!
'Cause I was just another notch in your bedpost, baby,
I was just another pawn in your game,
I was just another stroke on the tally, darling,
I was just your fifteen minutes of fame.
And now you're begging me, "Honey, give me one more chance,
let me rock your world just once more tonight" -
but I was just another notch in your bedpost, babe,
and I'm much happier now you're out of sight!
You thought you'd take advantage of a girl who was alone -
but what you found is a woman who is standing on her own!
'Cause I was just another notch in your bedpost, baby,
I was just another pawn in your game,
I was just another stroke on the tally, darling,
I was just your fifteen minutes of fame.
And now you're begging me, "Honey, give me one more chance,
let me rock your world just once more tonight" -
but I was just another notch in your bedpost, babe,
and I'm much happier now you're out of sight!
'Cause I just just another notch in your bedpost, babe,
and you can stay the hell right out of my sight!!
In a list
Comments
1 - 26 of 26
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Judges Verdict
Good write and best of luck -
Ah, the poem about the bastard. Everyone has had one of those bastards. Love the poem, straight to the point...which is how should be. Well done
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I like that your narrator grows more confident and self-assured, mimicking the natural progression of dead relationships. I appreciate your feedback on my poem the other day, too.
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As I began to read it kept me going, it was very sad and kinda made me want to cry too, you wrote this so perfectly and yes I love it completely I’m sure others will like this one too
Very talented write !
Keep up the good work
Shuberth
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WOW!
Simply put, that was AMAZING!! If this happened in real life I would say that the dude totally got burned!
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Aww, thankyou so much for the lovely comment!
Maria
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very nice, indeed. it would be a very catchy song.
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Thanks so much for the comment!
Maria
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ye old notch on the bedpost. Well, I doubt many of us escape that. Spunky rhyming.
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Lol, thanks so much for the comment
Maria
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Beautiful lyrics! Do you by any chance know anybody who could sing this? Or you could sing it, I would just like to hear how it would go. Thanks! Good luck!
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When I have the technology, I'll record it for you.
Think, Amanda Palmer-esque
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I hope the chap that this is directed at gets a chance to read it. He will be scared silly! Does "stroke on the tally" mean to keep score?
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It does indeed... if you don't know what a tally is, it's a way of counting, in groups of five usually, eg: |||| is four, then I would strike a line through those four lines to make a group of five
Thankyou so much for the comment (maybe one day I'll record the song and send it to him anonymously
)
Maria
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Okay. Woah. Amazing.
I'm super jealous at your ability right now. This is superb. Incredible.
Flows and tells a story with effortless rhyme and impressive English.
I love it.
Dean.
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"I was just your fifteen minutes of fame..." That is poetry...I love that line. It gives me chills because I remember when at one point, I was that guy. You completely described me... Keep it up Drama Queen
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Awesome!
Beautifully applied rage, I would say.
I'm a guy. A good guy. And those guys give all guys a bad name. Namely "male".
Way to stand strong.
Hence, my favorite lines: 34 and 35.
Much luck in the contest
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I know these types all too well, they seem to be the kind of people I date. Sorry that you have had this experience too, I wouldn't wish it on anyone.
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great write
yes i am a man no i do not treat women like that
but yes i know many men who do and im glad to see a woman who sticks up for her self
i here the stories of the men who say this girl is great in bed then go to someone eles and they pass her number around and tips on how to get her in bed and she just takes it im so glad you dont good job and good luck with your song. -
You have described your emotions in a wonderful way. The poem is well written. Well done, baby!
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Awesome job! I really felt the emotion behind this piece! An A+ job! Keep up the awesome work adn thanks so much for the share! I really am looking forward to reading more of your work....which I probably have already............ I read a lot of stuff on here and try to comment on everyones....Sorry for my mindless ramblings.............HAHA!!!!!
Again.....Thanks so much for the brilliant write and share! Good luck with future writes....but judging from this, you don't really need much luck!!!!!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~*~*~**~Heroesrox~*~*~*~*~*~*~~*~*~*~*~* -
To bad some love ends up like this. God lay out of 8 lines per verse and the mixture of just the two lines near the end. Those kid of guys are totally selfish.....Great poem
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bravo
should be pretty easy for this guy to get the message.hopefully he can learn and grow from it.
great write! -
Maria! As always, very well written!!!! I've always enjoyed reading your work and this one didn't disappoint!!!!
DAWN
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Dude! I like
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Huzzah!!
DUDE, SIX DAYS!!!!!!!!
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