Something that really annoys me
Is the ridiculous concept of fate
And all the nincompoops who say
That their lover is their "soulmate".
Has the whole world gone plum loco?
Do they know how dumb they sound?
I'm sorry but I just wanna smack 'em,
Those ridiculous, pathetic clowns.
Let me get this straight - two people
Living in some ancient time and place
Die then manage to meet again
Out of the entire human race?!?!
Now I believe in some crazy stuff
Like aliens, leprechauns and Yeti
But the whole idea of soulmates
Is too ridiculous even for me.
And to top things off, have you noticed
That people who talk about reincarnation
Were always Lincoln, Napoleon, Caesar
Or the leader of some other great nation?
How many people get to be Caesar?
I mean, the numbers just don't tally.
Wasn't anybody the greasy-haired guy
Who handed out shoes at the bowling alley?
Besides, if the concept of soulmates
Weren't utterly ridiculous on its face,
Looks or height wouldn't matter a bit.
Neither would wealth or age or race.
All that would matter is the soul,
The inner beauty, the person inside.
The outer self would be just a shell
In which their soulmate hitched a ride.
You'd see models marrying poor, ugly guys
And we all know they sure as hell won't.
You'd see movie stars marrying hobo's.
Do you ever see that? I don't!
They marry some trophy husband or wife,
then make everyone sick when they bluster
About finding their soulmate, with a sincerity
That only the mentally vacant can muster.
The reason two people have a lot in common
Is not very mind-boggling or mysterious.
We're all human so we like the same stuff!
I mean, come on. Really. Get serious.
I don't mean to be cruel or overly cynical
And I don't want to burst anyone's bubble
But "soulmate" is a hard title to live up to
And could land you in a whole lot of trouble.
Adding your comment:
and which the last line hit me, I really got into trouble.
Thanks for posting this - it is a breath of fresh air.
