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Those Stars

The Stars are so beautiful tonight
I can see your eyes elegantly watching
A caring and worried expression
Please don't worry child
You're too beautiful to cry
That time has come
I hate to let you down,
but those cosmic bodies are calling my name.
You did all you could and more
Love didn't choose me
Alone I depart
The memories we share will never be replaced
I wish I could tell you face to face,
but there just isn't time.
I'll never fire this gun again, no.
You were the only one to ever know.
I was never one for serious words but,
I'll miss you, I love you
My Stars have just lost their luster.

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Comments

1 - 8 of 8

  • Yummy Cinnamon Bun
    November 12, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Wow

    Ray...
    You're amazing my dear.
    This is such a wonderful piece, It gave me Chills deep into my soul.
    You're pure talent Ray. This is so...It feels so real.
    I felt that I was really saying bye for the last time to you.
    So sad.
    I love you.
    Yours truly,
    Erynn


  • FaerieNWonderland
    November 11, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    amazing

    i love how you just didn't come right out and say "i'm gonna kill myself" amazing write


  • Kathrin silver member
    November 11, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    nice

    well done


  • dabpunx
    November 11, 2008

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    Great Write

    This was a very somber read and it flowed very well. the words were very measured and I felt like it was me telling someone goodbye or you telling me. Very personal feel to this. I really enjoyed this.

    "You're to beautiful to cry"
    it's "too"


    • Supernova
      November 11, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks for the comment. I'm glad you enjoyed this.

      Thanks for pointing out the typo there. I really should proofread better. Thanks for the read.


      • dabpunx
        November 11, 2008
        Edit | Reply
        hey no problem. thank you for writing froom the soul or wherever. haha i usually proofread after i post myself. sometimes people miss typos or just don't say anything. i always appreciate it when someone catches mine too.


  • blueyez
    November 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    how sad!!! I agree with rena... it's lovely and quite poetic. This write draws the emotion out of the reader and forces them to feel. much props
    Peace and Love


  • Candyknife gold member
    November 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    omg

    ray this is so powerful...
    its beautiful and so melancholy
    every word is perfect
    im deeply impressed with this write, its my favorite of yours now, i cant believe you wanted to delete it..,
    seriously, bravo !
    i love it

1 - 8 of 8