In the night they bring me cookies,
My addiction to sustain,
I've tried to stop, I've tried so hard,
But I cant stand the pain!
It costs so much, and I am poor,
I have to steal the money.
I want to stop, but I cannot-
For they are just so yummy.
Chocolate chip- ten bucks an ounce;
peanut butter only five,
They cost so much- so very much
but upon them I survive.
In the night they bring me cookies,
My addiction to sustain,
I've tried to stop, I've tried so hard,
But I cant stand the pain!
Author notes
Nightbringer title prompt
The contest name is "Come to The Darkside.... We Have Cookies!"
In a list
A contest entry
- "Come to The Darkside.... We Have Cookies!" :D by Werewolf Avarus.
700 points, ended December 2, 2008, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Prewrites anyone? by XxNinjaNemoxX.
550 points, ended October 14, 37 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Make sure to comment and read my other poems =)
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Oh my gosh I love it!
They come to me in the night with cookies too, believe me
Thanks for entering and best of luck
xoxo. -
A pleasure to read, thank you for the entry.
'Wolf
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Hah! I got a laugh out of this!
I actually had chocolate chip cookies for lunch today. Delicious.
I don't know how you would go about changing it, but the second stanza felt a bit off. Maybe change around your "and"s and "but"s?
Funny write!
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Thank you! Can you be a bit more specific on what sounds a bit off? What line in particular?
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It's more of the wording in the first and last lines. I understand that it's difficult to stay within your rhyming scheme and whatnot, so I don't expect anything to be perfect.
It costs so much, that's why I'm poor,
I must steal money- going from door to door!
I want to stop, but it just isn't possible-
For they are just so irresistible.
Just a suggestion- no obligation for using it. Hope that helped? -
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Thanks =)
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No problem. Glad to help. (:
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