If you're thinking about buying a new kitchen

Kitchen fashionists are satis-MFIed

Your I(‘d)kea of mantles pieces within copyright prints and theft patent

Hitch-in your crash pit, where is your kitsch?

Can see your kitchen knife and reach for it

Slash Jan’s sales over heads, thousand off

Sale: at Dunelm Mills, curtains with hidey frill go for half the cost

Av’ it, av-erage

Argooses in your ponderences,
Plan a scratch down of your new room
And may you see another wannabe showroom of the showroom
You saw at B&Q,
Home base was your first base but you thought the glass surfaces were a bit too see-through and out-there
You decided to take the one with the free outside BBQ
yet, no stepping outside of the square

Take for the queue, buy few screws and watch it become out of style,
And see you’ll not like what you used to like because in the cupboard, the pop-ularity has gone and it’s in less demand
'sip-ply and demon-ed'

The diamond patterns are now out of style
Kitchen stupidists again tear it out, and take for the new tiles
those be..
the ones that sell well...
But take note instead of it taking your notes
It’ll only sell well with the majori’ for a while,

In two months time – it be a different story

Showrooms do not show you this

Let it be sold to your heart, not the fashion market