I don't need to don tulle as vestal virgins do
my flaws are transparent and unveiled
my best outfit does not consist of
designer clothes and luxurious jewelries
my wardrobe is unpretentious
I don't need a definition of beauty
sprang from a greek proverb
your eyes speak a thousand words
when you look at me...
when you touch me...
and embrace the shape of my body
is when I feel beautiful in my birthday suit
Author notes
a woman become more beautiful if undressed...Unknown.
In a list
A contest entry
- if undressed... by PrabhuDayal Khattar.
400 points, ended November 22, 2008, 15 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 36 of 36
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Amen!
Congrates on the gold sweet soul!
You did this up perfectly!
Just had to reread it!
Mucho love, Timothy
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This really is lovely. The first two lines are especially strong, and of course the ending is appealing, too. The whole thing is shot through with strong writing! The Gold is well deserved. Congratulations!!!!
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This, I must say, is an absolutely stunning piece of poetry. Beauty has many different interpretations and definitions, but I think I like yours the most. Love this one.
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You really deserved gold for this one, it's beautiful.
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I could not be happier to see that my friend, Prabhu, has chosen this beautiful poem for gold. Love, Lane
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Congrates On The Gold!
Beautifully Expressed here sweet soul, and I'm sure your birthday suit comes with a perfect fit through the eyes of love. Thanks for sharing your talented soul here, much love and light, Timothy aka poeticweaver~ xo
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Wow! you also checked me here, Thank you...
Anna Lee -
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My favorite line is the first line of the poem because it is so descriptive. Tulle is an interesting fabric & paired with vestal virgins puts a vivid image in my memory. My intention isn't to be rude or to hurt you, but I do not like the rest of the poem.
I understand that the poem is for a contest. Congrats on the gold. I feel like the concept of the poem is beautiful there is no denying that. But could there be showing than telling? "Your eyes speak a thousand words...", feels cliched to me.
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Thank you for your comment. That's okay, I am open to any comment/opinion. I also think it is cliche I am still trying my way on my writing
Blessed be,
Anna Lee
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Refreshing
It's nice to see a poem celebrating one's beauty and flaws. i.e., whole humanity. Bukowski said, "Maybe genius is saying something profound in a simple way." This poem does that.
Mark
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Mark,
Thank you so much for your wonderful comment. I am honored and humbled...
Anna Lee
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If only men thought in these images, and could speak to the women they love this way. Sensually delightful, and inspiring.
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thank you so much for reading this lol
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Humm..you made me smiling by this honest piece..and especially youar last line brought a grin on my face..a beautiful piece inded..thanks for sharing...
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Thank you so much for liking it and I'm glad it made you smile
and thank you so much for the inspiration for writing this piece and for the Gold
Salamat,
Anna Lee
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Winner! I like how sublime you have captured the prompt. Yes, I agree with your note...lol
Clothes are visual comfort of a person or individual - for me that is.
Thanks sobra anna and personally this piece of yours is one of my favorites.
Sige sulat pa
HENSLEY
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lol
Hensley,
Thank you din. I am bound to catch Pneumonia with this write lol. panindigan ko ba hahaha
Salamat na marami
Anna Lee
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Beautifully titled, and exquisite presentation of imagery. There is an "unpretentious" honesty surrounding this piece, that is disarming, so lovely. Geo
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Geo, thank you very much
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Hummm, so sensual and romantic this is!
The best outfit indeed, simple and inviting
Eyes of love and passion don't need to see more than skin, actually it's all that the eyes want to see.
Lovely poetry Anna
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Thank you Mari
and
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If all of us guys had the gift of Pablo Neruda, then you wouldn't need to write this poem. But sadly most of us either don't have the skills or the desire to say what's in our hearts. I know for me, the hardest thing in the world is to extract those deep deep feelings onto the page. Love and desire travel deeply and there is nothing worse than seeing those feelings trivialized by my inability to express them artistically.
So when he buys you a hammer, and tells you it's good for you to have one around, just in case you need to fix something, understand, that's his way of giving you flowers and expressing what is buried there.
Or he just a jerk, lol. i've been called that a few times.
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Anna!!! This is simple, elegant and amazing!!! Your writing just keeps getting better!!
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"I don't need a definition of beauty
sprang from a greek proverb
your eyes speak a thousand words
when you look at me..."
this poem is so beautiful, sooo beautiful, I love this, Anna...the title works so well...
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Thank you
admittedly, you're one of my inspiration to this...reading your writes...though I know I can't do justice with your style. I am learning a lot from you.
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I can relate to this
Lovely poem- short and to the point.
Also some lovely language in there.
Cool work!
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Thank you so much for checking my page and for your amazing comment
Anna Lee
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You entered another contest? lol
Well done on this write Anna
alot was said about the person you are
Good luck in the contest and all the best to you
Ken
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lol you noticed haha
Thank you Ken for the comment and for the encouragement in joining contests -
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You are welcome
Its good to see you're doing so
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you are beautiful..
in your birthday suit..WOW that alone says much more than the words imply. excellent piece of writing my friend!!
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Thank you
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this is lovely poetry and i love where you took the prompt. we are indeed beautiful when naked and open to our lover - there are so many kinds of nakedness...the literal and the spiritual. beautiful writing this!
~ Nicolette
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Thank you, you have been one of my inspiration in my writing
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honesty without inhibitions...
"There are few nudities so objectionable as the naked truth. "
Agnes Repplier (1855 - 1950)
best of
in the contest
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