I've loved you since we met with all my heart,
They told me that our love could never be
But you are all of everything to me,
Your name, sweet Juliet, holds us apart.
You are the dawn that gives each day its start,
The shining light that shows me what to do.
No other beauty shines as bright as you,
Your name, sweet Juliet, holds us apart.
More fair than can compare with any art,
More beautiful than any bird can sing.
I'd choose to offer you my wedding ring;
Your name, sweet Juliet, holds us apart.
I've loved you since we met with all my heart,
Your name sweet Juliet holds us apart.
Author notes
An echo sonnet inspired by the Shakespeare Play "Romeo and Juliet".
The echo sonnet is:-
A "new form" based on the Kyrielle sonnet, like the Kyrielle sonnet it has 3 quatrains and a couplet all ending with the same line (or a similar developing line ending with the same rhyming word) also like the Kyrielle sonnet the first line is also the penultimate (second to last) line. Unlike the KS however the poem is decasyllabic (ideally iambic pentameter) and the rhyme scheme is a*bbA accA addA a*A.
a*, a and A lines all rhyme and a* and A lines are the repeating lines.
In a list
A contest entry
- Romeo and Juliet Contest by misshugglebugglez.
626 points, ended November 23, 2008, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Romeo and Juliet by my02U.
480 points, ended December 8, 2008, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me honestly what you think, good or bad.
Comments
1 - 20 of 20
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Beautiful, and classic. I love the beginning especially.
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Very nice write! I was facinated by your take on Romeo's character - that he would blame Juliet and her name, and forget that his family was the other half of the problem! (I do that sometimes
) i liked the flow and rhyme, especially the echo - it tied the poem together very nicely! A few unimportant grammar issues, but not glaring errors, and it didn't detract from the poem. (i tend to be a really harsh grader. sorry!) My favorite stanza...
More fair than can compare with any art,
More beautiful than any bird can sing.
I'd choose to offer you my wedding ring;
Your name, sweet Juliet, holds us apart.
But really, it was all lovely!
Great job, good luck!
luv,
lovey
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The more I see the Echo sonnet the more I like it. You are too modest, you neglect to tell in your author's notes that you created it. Again, I love, love poems.
Love,
Amera♥
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What a very romantic, beautiful sonnet. I love the way the man pours out his heart to her yet he knows he will cause confusion...the ending is so sad.......excellent poem...Novy
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I like the title ...unlike others...i think if you read and understood Romeo and Juliet, you'll understand you piece and the title. Beautiful line, "your name, sweet Juliet, hold us apart"
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wow!!! this is absolutely beautiful... u definitely deserve to win this contest... its one of the most stunning love poems i have read on here. beautifully written,
hugs,
georgie,
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Interesting though I'll admit the title is a throw off. The Romeo and Juliet theme was pretty easy to see, but I think by name does it mean rank? If I'm wrong oh well, it was still a nice read. Good job,
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By "name" Shakespeare means family the families of Romeo and Juliet have a long running blood feud. The families are of the same "rank" are just busy taking an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.
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I enjoyed this echo sonnet and the couplet...
I've just learned the couplet....it really added a lovely
layer of soul to your poem!
well done! well done!
thanks for the lesson poet!
ears/Seattle
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this is beautiful. at first i did not understand it. the last line of each stanza the same. i do not get the title at all. i think it should be "your name holds us apart" other than that i really liked it. the emotion of wanting to be together but can't be together because of the disput between the two families is strong but in the end they wind up being together. even if it is in death. but doesn't that also make the two families friends because they have lost a son and a daughter?
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The title is Bill's
What's in a name? That which we call a rose
By any other word would smell as sweet;
So Romeo would, were he not Romeo call'd, -
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tis good answer.
it has been a while since i have read romeo and juliet. i have the book but it sadly sits on my self collecting dust. maybe i will pick it up and read it when i get home to day from school..
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LOVE IT!!!!!
Totally great I am a huge fan of R&J so your poem speaks to me
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Very nice, and as a girl always had a thing for Romeo and Juliet. I love it when I have time to read your work. Well done.
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I think this is so well written.You gave alot of thought to this and it shows.Good luck to you in this contest I think you have a good chance at winning.
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Excellent
A very fine write, indeed. Imagery; rhythm and rhyme are just fine. Thanks for sharing this one with us. -
very very beautiful piece of writing here, best of luck in the contest kathrin xx
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Another beautiful Echo Sonnet and based on one of 'the Bards' timeless stories.
All the best
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Simply stunning piece.
Well done and best wishes to you
Love you
Passions
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this was beautiful! i especially enjoyed the lines
"You are the dawn that gives each day its start,
The shining light that shows me what to do"
and "More fair than can compare with any art,
More beautiful than any bird can sing"
this poem was amazing! thank you very much for entering! good luck!
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